Ten Years
by kloi21
Summary: I've done the one thing that i swore i'd never do... Ten years on, what'll happen when both Kimberly and Katherine re-enter Tommys life?
1. The Calling

**DISCLAIMER**: I own nothing

**This story is set after Dino Thunder, although ages and details may be a bit off because I really didn't watch the show after AJJ left (disown me if you like but I couldn't bare to see them force Tommy and Katherine together.**

**This chapter just came to me and although I do this as a creative outlet and not for the glory of good reviews it is always nice to know with a new story if it's worth continuing.**

**CHAPTER 1**

'_**First I have to save the earth now I have to save a bunch of high school students from failing science… a knights work is never done!'**_

I chuckle to my self whilst inwardly scowling at the pile of essays I have in front of me. It's Saturday night, I should be out somewhere. I'm not sure where, since socialising has never really been my strong point but I know at 27 I should be somewhere that's not here!

…Then I look across at the tall blond woman lying asleep on my black leather couch and think maybe here isn't such a bad place to be after all.

Katherine Hillard, my second high school romance. The way her body stretches out whilst she's sleeping reminds me of the white kitty-cat that she was the first time I met her.

I smile slightly as my mind travels back to my high school years. I was a normal high school student by day, whilst by night I was an ass kicking super hero… well I say 'night' but I actually mean 'by late afternoon' or 'by free period' I chuckle again as I think about how considerate Zedd, Rita and everyone else were to never attack during classes. Then a frown forces my brows down as I consider how unfortunate I was that they did always attack when I was out with my friends or on a date…. The scent of vanilla fills my memory and I look over at my sleeping house guest and feel a twang of guilt at the knowledge that she never wore vanilla.

My relationship with Katherine is a complex one. It was never love at first sight or anything as romantic as that but she was there for me at a time when I needed her and my feelings grew from those of friendship into something more. Of course it didn't last, very few high school romances do- that I learned the heartbreakingly hard way long before Kat and I took our relationship in that direction, but a reunion of our closest friends just 2 months ago had brought us back to each other.

Love at first sight…. I waft away that damn vanilla scent and return to my marking

Hmmm… I wiggle the toe that is making a break for freedom through the end of my black cotton sock

'_**Hello toe' **_I think and then I realise that I'm just stalling so I reach for my red biro, safe in the knowledge that there will be plenty of big red crosses to keep me amused.

Seriously though, I do have to get out more. Since taking up my position as high school science teacher I kind of feel like I've become one of those stuffy teachers that used to teach us- back in the day. I always swore I would never turn out like them, but here I am, 27 years old, sitting in on a Saturday night whilst my gorgeous girlfriend sleeps on my couch.

My mind thinks of waking her up for a bit of a naughty interlude but then decides against. It's not that I don't find Katherine attractive- as I said she's gorgeous, tall…blonde…curvy but our relationship has never been like that. Sure we 'go there' but it's very rarely spontaneous or anywhere other than my bed.

A sigh escapes me but I focus on the essays in front of me rather than the meaning of life.

_**My bed… in my house… God I really am an adult now!**_

When exactly did that happen?

I massage the spot between my eyes and then try to focus on 'The Extinction Of The Dinosaurs' by Kevin Campbell

_**My God it looks like something that I wrote when I was 3!**_

I smile again as a very soggy vanilla smell invades my brain, I breath deeply hoping that I'll be able to capture the scent better, unfortunately all I smell is the lasagne that I burned earlier in the evening.

Putting my biro down I close my eyes and broach the subject that's been playing games with my mind since before-mentioned-reunion.

Two words for you- Kimberly Hart.

I inwardly growl… How could someone that is so tiny make such a massive crater in my life?

Our story is much different to mine and Kats though no less complex. This time though it was love at first sight, it was fireworks and roses…the whole nine yards. During the entire 3 years we were together I don't think I ever saw another girl but her, but in the age old tale of teenage romances it ended nastily, she met someone else I got my heart broken, yadda, yadda,yadda…

We successfully avoided one another for the 10 years that followed but two months ago we ran out excuses and found ourselves amongst our best friends with nowhere to run. We found a quiet place and had the not-so-quiet conversation we should have had 10 years ago, Kim cried, I pretended not to cry but at the end of it I found that 10 years really had helped to heal the wounds she had inflicted on me and we ended the night with a hug and a promise that we would keep in touch.

…She hasn't called.

…I'm bitter as hell!

I didn't think it would bother me but it has, I feel an anger that I thought I had moved past, I feel abandoned and passed over all over again, its ridiculous and makes no sense at all since two days later I hooked up with Katherine again but that's just how it is with me and Kim… nothing about it makes sense that's why 10 years on she's still imprinted in my brain and why I'm again thinking about her when I should be doing adult things…like my job.

Picking up my biro I place a big red cross next to the first part of Kevins essay before I even read it, I know it's childish but it gives me a happy…and a happy is all you can ask for from life.

**2 HOURS LATER**

Placing my biro down for the final time I consider whether I chose this career path as some kind of sick punishment to my self. I'm a good teacher, I know that and I love my chosen subject but sometimes I really feel like my words are silent to anyone under the age of 18. Unsure if I have ever read so much crap in my life I push myself up from my seat and head into the kitchen where I know there are ice cold beers that have 'Property Of Tommy Oliver' imprinted on the side.

I place one foot into my immaculate kitchen… Katherine's something of a 'neat-freak' when the sound of the phone ringing stops me in my tracks.

Hmmm… Beer or phone? Beer or phone? I weigh it up in my mind- the sensible, science teacher side of me wins out though and I pad back through the living room to pick it up before it wakes Katherine.

Reaching down and lifting the receiver from it's cradle on my small wrought-iron framed coffee table I check that Kat hasn't been woken from her nap…yes I did that on purpose! Before answering

"This is Tommy Oliver" sounds professional enough in case it's somebody from work but the silence that haunts the other end of the line tells me it's either Rocky or Jason looking to play games. Determined to beat them at it I say "I have Kat and a tub of whipped cream waiting so you better state your name and your purpose"

I hear an intake of air and I grin at the knowledge that I got them before they got me.

Point one goes to the spiky-haired science teacher!

"Name… Kimberly Hart…"

Ice water runs through my veins

"Purpose…Apology number two?"

I drop onto the armchair, sure that my knees are about to buckle

A small giggle escapes her lips but I can tell that it's forced

"…Hi Tommy, I said I'd call and… here I am… calling"

And here I am… wishing I could kill myself

_*My 'Project number 1' The Breaking Point is quite dark so I thought I'd try something a little different here x_


	2. A Prelude To Flirting

**DISCLAIMER**_: I own nothing1 just the heart felt wish that the real writers will find it in their hearts to do the right thing_

**CHAPTER 2**

"So, whipped cream hu? …I didn't know you had such a sweet tooth Tommy"

Kill me. Kill me. Kill me now!

"I uh… I thought you were Rocky or Jason playing pranks on me so… I thought I'd play one of my own… sorry"

I hear Kim sigh and wonder how I've survived these last ten years without that sweet sound

"Tommy, do me a favour…"

Like she thinks I could ever turn her down

"Next time you play a prank like that on Jason or Rocky, use me name, not Katherines"

Two thoughts hit my brain at the exact same time, first… no one has told her about my newly formed relationship with Katherine and two…was she flirting with me?!

I decide to test the water…

"Well, I guess I could… but Jason would probably kill me, and what good is whipped cream if you're dead?"

The sweet giggle that escapes her lips almost kills me first.

"So…you and Katherine are dating?"

I can hear something in her voice… like she's testing the water, if I told her the answer was yes would she be jealous?

…After 10 years, would I want her to be?

I knew I should be respectful to both women and tell her that the answer was yes

"We're just hanging out"

My God, Katherine will kill me if she finds out!

I hear the small intake of breath and hope she hasn't guessed the truth

God, Katherine really will kill me

"So, is it since the um, reunion?"

"Yes"

My first truthful answer today makes me feel good and makes my half truths feel justified

"Wow, now I really feel bad for not calling sooner"

Was that her second flirt?!

…Should I flirt back?

I want to but my girlfriend is asleep in the other room. I'm not a disrespectful guy but this is the one girl I've waited what feels like my whole life for an 'Adult Moment' with

"So why didn't you?"

I know I'm not going to win any seduction competitions with a line like that, but the part of me that desires the truth over everything else just won out over the part of me that desires Kimberly Hart over everything else

"It's a long story…do you have the time?"

I'm just about to tell her that I have 9 life times in which all I want to do is listen to the sweet words of her long stories but before I can say a word, Katherines voice breaks through my thoughts.

"Tommy?"

Oh my God, I am so busted! I know that technically I'm not doing anything wrong but I'm talking to my ex-girlfriend in the quiet confines of my kitchen whilst my current girlfriend sleeps in my living room. Now she's awake I'm like a child that's been caught playing with his presents before Christmas

"Kim…"

I whisper in my most innocently hushed tones_**. **_

"I forgot to take out the trash and I…really, really need to do it, can I get your number off my phone and call you back?"

I hear her voice lift in confusion and it hurts me in a way I thought I was long past

"Are you blowing me off?"

No, no, no! …yes!

"Kimberly I'm really sorry …"

Sighing she adds_**…**_

"This is just like at the reunion, one minute you were there and wanting to talk, the next minute you were gone"

The Dino Rangers!… I curse them in my mind for the number of times they dragged me from my 'Big Conversation With Kimberly' but I can hear Kat quickly approaching and know my 'Fun Time' is done

"But at the reunion I always came back, didn't I, and I will call you back this time- I promise!"

"…Okay"

"Don't move too far from your phone ok?"

I mean it as a prelude to a flirt and just hope she picked up on it.

"Bye Tommy"

I do the last thing I want to do in the world and say…

"Bye Kim"

_*Again, this is just a break from the seriousness of the breaking point but I think it could turn out to be really interesting. Let me know if you hate it or rate it x_


	3. The Problem With Men

**DISCLAIMER:** I own nothing good, only the characters you don't recognise.

_*I can't keep control of any of my stories, they always seem to take on a life of their own, I tried to write a story from one persons point of view but pretty soon all I could think about was what Kim would be thinking, so here it is- a two sided story x_

**CHAPTER 3**

Tommy didn't call.

And I am so not bothered!

And the fact that I deleted his number from my cell phone this morning is just me saying 'I've made peace with the past now I can move on' it definitely doesn't mean that I'm pissed because I sat up half the night waiting for him to call only to have him completely blow me off.

I look down at the 5 broken pencils littering my desk and decide I simply don't know my own strength.

Fashion design is a difficult thing-especially when you spend hours designing a dress only to then look at it and realise that it's almost exactly the same as the dress you saw at the mall last Saturday that you really, really wanted but couldn't afford because you'd just spent your entire pay cheque on those really cute boots you couldn't say no to… it's even more difficult when you can't seem to keep a pencil in one piece

I steal a glance at my cute pink cell phone and no it's not to see if Tommy has called to grovel at my feet. I called Aisha this morning but couldn't get through- I'm waiting for her to call me back.

Eva, my assistant, arrives with the coffee I ordered 20 minutes ago and I consider taking all of my frustrations out on her, using the guise of her being late as an excuse, but when I see the croissant she has brought me as an apology I decide just to vent instead.

Taking a sip of my coffee and enjoying the feel of the hot liquid burning my throat I ask the question that has been bugging women since time began

"Eva, why are all guys jerks?"

She looks at me, her turquoise eyes wide with surprise at my choice in conversation and then she appears to give it some really deep thought.

"Genetics?"

I laugh so hard that I almost choke on my first bite of warm croissant

"It doesn't matter who they are or how much you think- this guy is really different…"

"Kim…" Evas voice cuts in just as I was getting ready to really rant over the uselessness of all men- especially those you think you can trust with your life and yet they can't even return a phone call. Okay, it was a phone call that was probably 10 years too late but at least I had the guts to make it. Has he called me once in the whole 10 years since we split up? NO! and yet he had the nerve to tell me that I was the only one who did something wrong. God, I wish I had never even gone to that stupid reunion- talk about opening Pandoras box!!!

Taking a breath I reply sweetly "Yes Eva?"

"I think the fact that they're all guys means that they never can be different, jerkishness is just bred into them. Their Granpas were jerks- guaranteed, their Fathers were jerks- another guarantee so that pretty much means that any son shall therefore be a jerk"

I like the way this girl thinks, so smiling through a mouthful of bready goodness I ask "Wanna date?"

"Sorry I don't do chicks… just jerks!" we both giggle so hard that Eva manages to spill black coffee on her new white Armani jacket screaming in horror she rushes from her seat in search of a dry cleaner.

Yes she should be working but I don't stop her because I too know the pain that comes from your favourite designer being introduced to your favourite refreshment. Believe me- Prada and Merlot is never a good look.

Suddenly the noise of something vibrating drags me from my fashion nightmare and as I pick up the phone a number that isn't recognised is calling me.

It could be work-related although it's office hours so they would know to call me here, it could be a wrong number- apparently my number is very similar to the number of somebody called 'John' because I've had 4 wrong number calls looking for him this month alone. Then there's the possibility that it could be my good friend- the ever forgetful Tommy Oliver.

I take a second to decide whether I should answer it and then yell abuse at him or whether I should just hang up on him. I know from past experience that the silent treatment gets to him like nothing else on earth.

Grinning mischievously I press accept, I recognise the sigh before he ever speaks and I bite my lips in anticipation of the grovelling to follow.

Unfortunately, 'Naughty Kim' who knows I'll get to him much more by saying nothing suddenly has control of my hand and before he can mutter one 'I'm sorry' the cell phone is flipped shut and back looking cute on my desk.

There you go- how's that for teaching the Multi-Coloured Morphin Moron a lesson?


	4. Struggles with the truth

**DISCLAIMER:I own nothing that's any good. All characters that you don't recognise are mine**

**CHAPTER 4**

That's three times I've tried to call Kim to apologise and that's three hang ups!

…I'm officially pissed off!

I can feel the frustration at not being given the chance to use the excuses I spent all of last night coming up with dragging me into a bad mood, so instead of inflicting myself on my unsuspecting students I decide a pop quiz is definitely the way to go. That way they can quietly get on with it whilst I supervise.

Well, I say 'supervise' and I suppose that technically I am since I am going to be in the same room as them, it's not like I'm running off to France or anything but my attention may be else where as I attempt to come up with a cunning plan to get Kimberlys email address from a friend and then bombard her account with apologies until she has to pick up the phone, if only to tell me to stop emailing her and that's when I'll drop the 'B' bomb

I never really saw myself as the 'stalking' type, but I have to admit, when it comes to Kim I'm really getting into it.

Sitting behind my desk at the front of the classroom I warn the class that yes- I do have x-ray vision and I do it in such a serious tone that I swear some of them believe me.

Satisfied with my work I open my laptop and fire it up whilst deciding who will be easiest to fool into giving me Kims email address without them asking too many Kimberly/Katherine related questions.

I'm still puzzling about it as my mind tries to retrace the steps of my new found infatuation with my ex-girlfriend

I mean 10 years is a long time, and it's not like I've been sat under a black cloud crying for her every day since she left me. Yes, in the beginning I was hurt and I'm not too proud to say I cried, but once she had gone she pretty much stayed gone (Except for coming back that one time only to be kidnapped and sacrificed to a monster living in a volcano…but I'll leave that memory for another time)

I moved on with my life, found another girlfriend (The before-mentioned Katherine) and once my Ranger days were over (first time around) I started a career in racing cars before going to university and studying for a PHD which then started a whole new chapter of my life (Dinosaurs, experiments that went more than a little wrong…Dino Rangers!)

Through all of this, sure I thought about Kim from time to time. My best friends are her best friends too so I'd hear bits and pieces of what she was up to but no body really felt comfortable enough to go into detail about her with me. My fault, I have to admit I put up some pretty big 'Keep Kim and any mention of her out' walls but I never really sat around wondering what she was up to.

Until the reunion…

Jasons idea- big dumb idiot that he is!

He thought it would be fun for us to all get together again, since we were now 'scattered throughout the land like precious, multi coloured jewels'- Zacks poetic phrasing, not mine!

Although all of my old friends and team mates were going to be there I fully intended to say no, in fact I did say no, I gave Jase a line about having classes to teach, responsibilities etc, etc, etc and he took it really well, better than I was expecting if I'm honest and I'd all but forgotten about it until I got a new… revised invitation.

I was cordially invited to attend a reunion of my closest high school friends at the new location of… Reefside!!!!!!

Gee- wasn't I thrilled, an entire weekend with the person I'd been avoiding spending a minute with for more than ten years

Clicking on my email account I decide on Rocky as my best option.

Rocky DeSantos is the best friend you will ever make in your life, he is 110% loyal and more than 110% committed to never lying. Knowing that no matter what I tell him, he will never betray my trust, I decide to be 90% honest with him.

I click onto my email account and I'm just about to start typing when I feel the gentle vibration of my mobile phone against my leg.

The eternal optimist within me immediately hopes that it's Kimberly calling to say she forgives me and my Swiss cheese memory.

Excusing myself whilst also reminding my class that x-ray vision means I can also see through door panelling I hurry out into the corridor. Pulling my phone from my pocket I'm more than a little disappointed to see that it's only Aisha.

I hope my cheerful greeting disguises my disappointment

"Aisha! Long time no…"

But my cheery greeting is cut off by disappointment its self

"You didn't tell Kim about you and Katherine!"

Busted… for the third time in two days… I've really got to start telling the truth more!

"What were you thinking?"

I think about telling the truth (I was thinking about flirting with Kim) …and then I panic!

"Did you tell her, does she know?"

I hope it sounded like a casual enquiry but from the long intake of breath I fear I've given myself away

"No, but why didn't you?"

The truth? …something resembling the truth actually leaves my lips

"I wasn't expecting her call and I guess… it never came up"

I am so going to hell, it came up enough for me to tell her that I was just hanging out with Katherine

Why can't I just be honest with the people I care about most, my oldest friends? Why do lies and half truths escape me so easily and why don't I feel more guilty about doing it?

"You really should tell her Tommy before someone else does"

Wise old yellow…now I feel like my students must when I'm lecturing them about doing the right thing

"Kim won't talk to me because I didn't call her when I said I would, how am I supposed to tell her anything? …I don't suppose you could put a good word in for me, tell her I was ill or…abducted by aliens maybe"

I hear the hope in my own voice and the excitement that's sparking in my stomach tells me I really need to spend some time becoming better acquainted with the truth about this situation I've found myself in.

"Why don't you tell me what really happened and then I'll decide if I'm on your side or not"

The truth…?

***_Next time: Will Aisha talk to Kim for Tommy? Will Kim buy his story? And will Tommy tell Kim the truth about his relationship with Kat?_**


	5. Games

_**DISCLAIMER: **__**I own nothing except the characters you don't recognise which is… 1 so far!**_

_***At the end of this chapter I've included the lyrics of a song that was part of the inspiration for this story, it's a bit of an insight into where this is going if you hadn't guessed already**_

**CHAPTER 5**

Sitting at my dining room table I scowl at the pile of essays before me.

Wednesday night is beginning just like every other night this week and as I look over at Katherine who is again lying asleep on my sofa I feel a twinge of annoyance.

We've only been back together for a couple of weeks, this should be the honeymoon period, things should be new and exciting… they're not.

I guess that's the risk you run when you hook up with someone for the second time, sometimes you just fall right back into the same routine you were in when you were last together and you forget to remember that there was a reason it didn't work out. Not that I'm saying this isn't going to work, I just mean it didn't work when it was like this before so if things don't change there's a pretty good chance it wont work out this time…

Picking up my biro I decide to stop rambling on at myself and get some work done.

Oh and Kim never did call back.

I had hoped I'd convinced Aisha to fight my corner for me. She seemed to believe me when I said I'd fallen asleep, and when she hung up saying she would see what she could do I have to admit to getting my hopes up a bit

That was a couple of days ago and still no word.

I made some attempts to secure her email address from an unsuspecting friend but unfortunately she'd seen that one coming and called everyone to let them know they were not to give her email address to anyone- especially not spiky haired science teachers!

It was one mistake… and it wasn't totally my fault either, Katherine's the one who dragged me away and Kim knew it was out of character for me to just completely ditch her and she hasn't exactly called back to make sure that I'm ok.

I mean with our background in fighting evil and all she should have known that something terrible could have happened to me, I could have been turned evil and on my way to New York in an attempt to kill her again, or I could have been turned into a small child… that used to happen a lot!

My point is… if she cared about me at all she would have been worried and then she would have called and she hasn't.

Tired of thinking, I decide I definitely need to get some work done.

I'm just about to pick up the first essay when the sound of my phone ringing propels me from my seat. I don't know whether it's the time of night or the weird sense of deja-vu that just swept over me but I have a feeling that I know who this is- call me eternally optimistic.

Running to the coffee table, I grab the phone from the cradle, press 'answer' so the noise doesn't wake Katherine and then I head straight for my bedroom… and privacy

Shutting the door tight I drop onto my bed before finally speaking

"Hello?"

Stuff the professional telephone manner- I know it isn't anyone from work"

"So… apparently you had something you wanted to say to me"

I grin as I immediately pick up on the teasing tone in Kims voice. Settling back on my bed I decide to play along

"Did I? hmm… I can't quite remember, you know, I've been told in the past that my poor memory is my worst quality"

I hear her long intake of breath and know this will be fun

"Fine, I have to wash my hair anyways, bye Tommy…"

Okay that's definitely not fun…

"Kim I'm sorry…"

I'm a feeble excuse for a man I know, but I can't take the risk that she's serious

"So, you fell asleep huh?… glad to know I have that effect on you"

"I'd had a really long day, you know how kids can be…"

Okay…now I sound like my dad, I'm really not going to be winning any cool points tonight

"Anyways, when I woke up it was late… really late, early even! …and then when I rang, you hung up and then I tried to get your email address and you'd set everyone against me"

"So wait, you tried calling and were going to try emailing… what, are you like a stalker now or something?"

"I was considering it"

She giggles at that and I know I'm forgiven, but I decide to ask just to make sure.

"I suppose, but only because it's you, if it had been any other guy that had blown me off he wouldn't have seen me for dust but since it's you and since I did try to kill you once, I guess I'll make an exception"

She's picking up exactly where she left off last time and my heart pounds at the possibilities

"I tried to kill you more than once, remember when I was green I tried a lot…"

"Tommy, you're supposed to be giving me reasons to stay on the phone not to hang up"

She giggles again and I feel more alive than I have in years… ten years to be precise

"So… how are you doing?"

The sigh that travels down the line and kisses my right ear, tells me something's wrong and I wonder what it says about me that I can't wait to hear all about it.

"I need to get out of here Tommy"

Okay, I didn't expect that

"Um…w…what?"

Please tell me that some woman find stuttering an attractive quality in a guy

"Where should we go?"

For a second I actually think that she is asking me to go away with her but then I remember.

This was a game we used to play when we were dating, If school or home or…'work' were getting too much we used to ring each other and play 'let's get out of here'. The fact that she wants to play now reaffirms my suspicions that something's wrong but I decide just to go with it

"Where do you want to go?"

"Tommy, I can't believe you remembered"

"Well there's some things that even I can't forget. So, where are we off to this time?"

"Somewhere quiet with no bright lights, it has to be by the sea and you have to wear speedos… green ones!"

Although in my real life there is no way I would be caught dead in speedos, this is Kims world and her wish is my command

"How about Australia again?"

I suggest it knowing what she'll say

"Na, too Kat-ish"

I laugh slightly but even the mention of my girlfriends name doesn't make me feel guilty -I decide to file that thought away for later, right now I'm playing…

"How about Spain?"

She takes a second to think it through before responding

"Maybe, Aisha went with Adam and Rocky a couple of years ago and she said the guys there were really cute"

"Okay, so definitely not Spain"

"What's wrong Tommy? jealous?"

I smile up at the ceiling as I whisper in my most seductive voice

"Eternally"

"I'm glad to hear it"

Her breathy response tells me that we're getting into dangerous territory, my brain should be yelling DANGER! DANGER! But the damn thing's too busy thinking about Kim

"Britain, It's an island so there'll be plenty of sea"

"Rains too much"

Deciding that we could go all around the world twice and she still wouldn't find somewhere that suited her I try somewhere a little closer to home

" How about you just come down to Reefside?"

"That would work"

I ignore the feeling that's been growing since entering into this teenage game, the feeling of really wishing this wasn't a game…but Kim quickly moves onto the important stuff

"How's the shopping?"

"Good enough to guarantee that I'll have enough bags to carry that I can class it as a workout"

"And the night life?"

The emphasis that Kim puts on the word 'night' sets a fire in my soul that I know I'm going to spend the rest of my life trying to put out and I worry that it's tainted me for all other women.

I decide to stick to the safe answer

"Lively, but no bright lights and there's this cool little seafood restaurant down by the beach that you will love. Oh but no scallops for me apparently I'm allergic and didn't know"

"How'd you find out?"

"I ate some… I swelled up"

She giggles and not for the first time tonight I wish this was real

"So, what should I wear for this 'seafood date'?"

Kims voice has just taken on a sultriness that I've never heard from her before and it's playing all kinds of havoc with my senses. I know I should call an end to this now, it's going too far but my lips just seem to keep moving under her spell

"Well if we're going to be spending a lot of time at the beach I guess you're going to have a pretty good tan and I always did like you in white"

The sultry darkness of my own voice is a completely involuntary response

"You only liked me wearing white because you thought it was like a badge saying 'Property Of Tommy Oliver'"

I'm denying nothing

"Like I said, I always did like you in white"

She lets out a little snort at my comment and I find my mind wandering to what she's wearing now, she drags my mind out of the gutter with the sound of her voice

"Any good motels?"

And now it's back where it started, and causing words to slip over my lips before my brain has time to think of the implications

"I have a spare room"

The line goes dead and I wonder if I've gone too far. My heart pounds in my ears and I half expect to be on the receiving end of the dialling tone.

Her reply puts my mind at ease

"Throw in breakfast in bed and you've got yourself a deal"

And to that I have no witty retort.

Unfortunately my stupid heart has to go and make its self heard

"I've missed this"

Kims 'I've missed _**you' **_leaves me speechless.

Seriously, it's as though my brain has literally died. I struggle for a response but everything dies on my tongue.

Massaging the bridge of my nose I'm saved from my embarrassing silence by Kim informing me that she'll have to go because there's somebody at her door.

I want to tell her to ignore them but all that comes out is 'Uh-huh'.

She tells me that we'll talk soon- I want to talk now but my entire body has shut down. It's as though I'm inside looking out at my self but can do nothing to stop my self saying

"Bye Kim"

And then hanging up…

_***This song is 'Lips Of An Angel' by Hinder and it's kind of where I got my inspiration for this story. There's a really great T/K vid on you tube using this song too I definitely recommend watching it x**_

Honey why you calling me so late?

It's kinda hard to talk right now.

Honey why are you crying? Is everything okay?

I gotta whisper 'cause I can't be too loud

Well, my girl is in the next room

Sometimes I wish she was you

I guess we never really moved on

It's really good to hear your voice saying my name

It sounds so sweet

Coming from the lips of an angel

Hearing those words it makes me weak

And I never wanna say goodbye

But girl you make it hard to be faithful

With the lips of an angel

It's funny that you're calling me tonight

And, yes, I've dreamt of you too

And does he know you're talking to me

Will it start a fight

No I don't think she has a clue

Well, my girl is in the next room

Sometimes I wish she was you

I guess we never really moved on

It's really good to hear your voice saying my name

It sounds so sweet

Coming from the lips of an angel

Hearing those words it makes me weak

And I never wanna say goodbye

But girl you make it hard to be faithful

With the lips of an angel

It's really good to hear your voice saying my name

It sounds so sweet

Coming from the lips of an angel

Hearing those words it makes me weak

And I never wanna say goodbye

But girl you make it hard to be faithful

With the lips of an angel

And I never wanna say goodbye

But girl you make it hard to be faithful

With the lips of an angel

Honey why you calling me so late?


	6. Introducing the black clouds

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing but the characters you don't recognise**

**CHAPTER 6**

What a great way to start the morning, a steaming hot espresso, a blueberry muffin and the latest addition of vogue… what more could a girl want?

Oh, and did I mention I was being paid for this?

My inner valley girl squeals at how kind life has been to me and then I spot the black cloud on the horizon, and it's heading my way.

My boss…Marcus Brent, he's a couple of years older than me, sandy coloured hair, denim blue eyes, he's about 5'7 and built as though God designed him him-self.

…Needless to say we dated, and as he steps out of his office and glares in my direction it's needless to say that it didn't work out… stupid reunion!

Ducking my head and pretending to be completely engrossed in vogue I hope this is one storm that will just pass me by, I'm feeling way too happy to let him rain on my parade. Unfortunately, the clouds look like they are settling in over head

"Miss Hart…"

A small groan escapes me but I try my best to disguise it as I raise my eyes to meet his and plaster on my best fake smile.

"Marcus…"

I try to sound enthusiastic but my smile is faltering as I notice his eyes, which had been fixed on mine and are now roaming south…

My 'Inner Pink' screams at me to slap that smarmy smile right off of his face and I would do it too… if he wasn't my boss, and if I hadn't spent a really, really long time trying to get this job.

So instead I pick up my edition of vogue and hug it close to my chest, it provides me with some protection from his prying eyes

Gazing wistfully at the espresso that is no longer steaming, I hope that this is over quickly, because ever since we broke up he's been determined to make my life a living nightmare

"How can I help you Mr. Brent?"

It's polite.. Courteous..

"The designs that you submitted aren't up to scratch, actually they're in my bin as we speak…"

In a split second I'm on my feet and my hands are planted firmly planted onto my hips.

I can tell by the lecherous smile that's creeping across his lips that he's less intimidated by my stance than he is turned on.

Please let this be a reminder to me to stay away from short skirts and fitted black shirts at work. In future I actually think I'll wear a sack… a long one at that!

"You can't do that"

It escapes my lips as a whine may escape a small childs

"Can't I? and here I was thinking I'm the boss and can do whatever I like"

His sarcasm is nothing more than a red flag to a bull

"My designs were good!"

"They were below par"

"The client liked them"

"The client had more money than sense. I don't like them, this is my company, what I say goes and I want new designs on my desk by Saturday"

Today is Thursday and I worked on those designs for two weeks, there is no way I can redo them in two days and the jerk standing in front of me knows that too, that's why he's grinning at me as he places a hand on my shoulder. I shrug it off but that just makes his smile wider.

I really want to kick his ass right now- I know for a fact I could… but I really, really want this job

"No problem Marcus, I'll have them ready for you by Saturday"

His smile falters but I don't hang around to see it, instead I drop into my chair and turn my back on him

"Oh and Kim…"

I ignore the fact that he's speaking as I reach out a hand that is trembling with anger and take hold of my luke-warm coffee cup.

"Pink is out"

I spin around in my seat, ready to risk it all and scream profanities at him but I find him almost skipping back to his office, he's so pleased with himself.

I spin back and begin counting to ten, I get to four and then abandon all hope of calming myself, instead I decide to call Aisha. Scrolling to contacts I click on the 'As' and then keep going, right through the 'Bs', the Ks… I hit the T's and find my finger stops.

He's been on my mind ever since our conversation…could I call him again so soon?

I know the sound of his voice will make me feel like everything's going to be okay, but I just called him last night and I don't want to seem too… enthusiastic, but the truth is he's been on my mind ever since the reunion.

Should I call him again?

Would he think I was stalking him?

Would he want me to?

I'm shocked from my indecision by Evas voice and I look up to find her standing in front of my desk with a dirty piece of paper in her hand

"Kim, isn't this one of your designs for the Sports Wear campaign?"

I take a closer look, and yes, it is one of my 'below par' designs…

"Why's it disguised as a paper aeroplane, where did you get this?"

The look on her face tells me she doesn't want to say

The look on mine tells her that she doesn't have a choice

"It kind of…flew at me"

"It flew…by it's self?"

"Out of Marcus' window"

As the last words leave her mouth Eva ducks her head and her face disappears under an avalanche of black curls as she disappears past me

I'll kill him! I swear to God… he'll sack me.

Grabbing my phone I hit the 'T' button, a greeting is barely mumbled before I say in my lowest… most sincere tone

"Trini, are you sure I can't just kick his ass?"


	7. Uh, sorry, what was the question?

**DISCLAIMER:I own nothing, except Eva and Marcus (Not that he's something to be proud of ****J )**

_***Oh my gosh, Cranelove you have really given me something to think about. You think Tommy is an ass in this story and that so isn't what I'm trying to do. The idea isn't that he's trying to hurt Kat, it's that since the dismantlement of the Dino Rangers he's bored, and when Kim comes back into his life she brings that spark of excitement he's been missing. Hmmm… I need to seriously think about this one…**_

_**Thanks for your continued input though, I really appreciate it x**_

**CHAPTER 7**

I'm late!

Rounding the street corner I catch sight of the restaurant where I'm sure Kat is sat patiently waiting… because she is never late. I, on the other hand am never on time.

Glancing at my watch I'm relieved to see that I'm only running 15 minutes late, if I arrive within the next 5 minutes I'm pretty sure she'll consider me to be on time and I might even score a couple of brownie points, I'm collecting them you see, I'm hoping that if I collect enough I might be able to convince her to bring out the pink spandex… for one night only!

Deciding I have time to spare I stop as I pass by a department store and inspect my reflection.

I'm still wearing the cream chinos and short sleeved khaki shirt that I wore for work and I'm aware that I'm not looking my best… I had a really long day, followed by a really long detention duty, followed by a game of 'where are my car keys?'

As I look down at the briefcase in my hand I realise just how much I look like a science teacher.

I'm a palaeontologist, it's what I studied all those years for but looking at my reflection now, I see myself morphing into Mr. Wilton and my brain feels sick at the thought .

I guess a science teacher is what I am now

There was a time… a few times actually when I was part of a team that stood between evil and the destruction of the earth, now I teach people about the destruction of the earth I guess it's true what they say, those that can- do those that can't- teach!

Is this all I am now?

Pulling off my glasses I decide that what I really am, is late and if I don't want to lose those brownie points I'd better move my ass.

Entering the restaurant I spot Katherine immediately. She's sat at a table for two next to the window, silently sipping on a glass of red wine.

She's wearing a pale pink sun dress, and her blond hair is in a perfectly straight bob. She's bathed in the orange light of a dying sun and when she spots me standing in the door way the smile that lights up her face causes me to glow pink with shame.

These last few days my thoughts have been everywhere except on Kat… okay, everywhere means Kim but looking at her now I'm ashamed of the game I've been playing.

If Kat knew, it would hurt her, and God knows I've hurt her enough in the past.

I resolve to put all thoughts of Kim out of my head. If she happens to call I will be polite and friendly and when I hang up I will tell Katherine exactly who I've been speaking to, because it will have been completely innocent and I wont have anything to hide

As I sit down Kat hands me a glass of wine that she already took the liberty of ordering and informs me that she ordered me the green salad and garlic bread as a starter.

My jaw tenses and I don't know why.

When we were dating in high school it was a habit we got into…not the wine, but Kat picking my starter because she knew that I would be late.

Why does it irritate me that she's just picking up where we left off?

"How was your day?"

She has to ask me twice before I snap out of my thoughts and I inform her it was long whilst taking a sip of the overly sweet wine.

I look around the restaurant, it's nice…comfortable, not too fancy… I think I could get away with ordering a beer with dinner but as I suggest it to Kat she harshly informs me that this is not the place to be drinking beer- what would people think of us?

Again I survey my surroundings, it seems 'beer happy' to me but I let the idea go as I return to sipping at the thick… sweet wine…that could possibly be blood, it looks like blood. As I swirl it around my glass I decide it's thick enough to be blood if the owners are really cheap and have watered it down a bit to make it go further…

Katherines speaking now, I'm aware of it but I'm not aware of what she's saying, my mind is filled with all the possibilities of how a glass of blood would happen to be served to me at dinner

" Tommy?"

My eyes shoot up from my glass and I notice that Kat is looking at me as though she's waiting for an answer.

Uh… what was the question?

I try to think of an answer that will cover all the questions of the world. Something that doesn't give it away immediately that I have been with her for 5 minutes and haven't heard a single thing she's said.

At a loss I give in and admit defeat

"Sorry Kat, what were you saying?"

"How was your day, did you speak to the principal about getting some time off?"

Time off? Okay, now I'm completely lost

Flashing her my most innocent smile I ask her what she's talking about and the look of disappointment on her face only increases my sense of shame

"Tommy, we talked about it last night, I have an audition in L.A next month, I asked if you could get some time off work to come with me, you know, a couple of days away, just the two of us"

Blurry memories and half sentences come back to me, how come I didn't remember that conversation before now?

Two words… Kimberly Hart.

It'd been just after I got off the phone with Kim. I'd gone down into my living room where Kat had presented me with her idea, unfortunately I was in 'Hartland' and I didn't hear much of what she was saying

I'm a complete jerk… Kat and I have only been back together for a little while and I'm already taking her for granted

Looking into her pale blue eyes I notice the look of concern for the first time

"Tommy, are you ok?"

Running a hand over my short spikes I inform her that I'm fine

"I know this has all happened so fast, us getting back together and then me getting the job at the dance studio in Reefside. Are you feeling a little overwhelmed?"

She reaches out and touches my hand and all I can do is shake my head, but inside I wonder if that's the truth.

Kat's right, everything has happened so fast.

One minute I'm yelling at Kim, then I'm hugging her and telling her I forgive her, then Kat and I are doing shots at The Dog And Parrot and talking about old times, then re-enacting old times…next thing I know she's calling me up from Angel Grove to tell me that she's been offered a job in Reefside and has accepted it

Am I overwhelmed?

Looking into Kat's eyes which are shadowed by concern and hope and that eternal optimism that I've always liked about her I decide tough luck if I am and then I jump head long into things

"Sure I'll come to L.A with you, it'll be fun"

She squeezes my hand and a smiles lights up her entire face

I find it sort of strange that I feel no urge to smile, only the urge to finish this glass of wine and then get right on to the next one

_*** I know these chapters are short but I'm still doing this as light relief from the tangled web I've created with The Breaking Point. If they're so short that you feel like I'm missing stuff out let me know x **_


	8. Chasing ghosts

**DISCLAIMER:I own nothing (Except the characters you don't recognise)**

**CHAPTER 8**

**_5AM SATURDAY, IN KIMS OFFICE_**

My hand is killing me!

I wave it in front of my face as though proving a point to myself -and it could only be to my self seeing as how I'm the only person in the office, actually I'm the only person in the entire building. I have been here for 2 days solid, I haven't slept, I've barely eaten, in fact the only decent conversation I've had has been with myself!

If Marcus doesn't love these designs he can stick his job and then I will stick these sheets of paper somewhere that will make his eyes water.

Putting down my pencil I head towards the coffee machine… again, it's 5 am, the office doesn't open for another 3 hours and I have been here since… Thursday?

I don't think I can remember actually going home!

Refilling my cup I stretch my neck from side to side, the pull of the stiff muscles feels good but the familiar buzz from the coffee feels better.

I really want to go home, I really, really want a hot bath with my favourite lavender essential oils and I want to light some candles and pour my self a glass of wine and put on a really relaxing c.d. In short- I just want to chill… and then I want to call Tommy.

It's been two nights since we last talked and seeing as how we went 10 years before that without talking you'd think I would be dealing with this better… but I'm not

I've spent the last 48 hours drawing, erasing and replaying my conversations with Tommy in my head.

I've come to two conclusions, 1. I still think he's hot as hell and 2. There's something he's not telling me.

First of all Tommy never says he's going to call me back and then forgets, in the entire 3 years of our relationship he never once totally forget. Yes, occasionally he'd be a couple of hours late and I'd give him hell and he'd be so cute when he apologised that I'd forgive him immediately but he never didn't call, I know 10 years is a long time but I refuse to believe that he's changed that much… or maybe I'm hoping that his feelings haven't changed that much.

Either way I still think something's going on, like how jumpy he's been when we've been talking, it's like he's constantly on edge, like… he could be caught at any time. Like he used to be when I'd call him late at night to play our favourite get away game and hewas worried that his parents would catch him.

Returning to my seat I ponder the inner workings of Dr. Tommy Olivers mind and am heartbroken to realise that I really don't know him any more.

Now, ask me the inner workings of Tommy Oliver aged 17's mind and I could tell you it inside and out. I knew him better than I knew myself back then. He was all about 3 things- saving the world, karate and little old me.

Well, I wasn't old then, but I'm sure getting old now and these all nighters, coupled with my love of coffee are not doing anything for the aging process.

Poking around in my handbag I find what I'm looking for, a small black mirror. Flipping it open I physically recoil in horror.

I'm starting to look like my mother!

I slam it shut and throw it into the bottom of my bag.

Now I'm hungry, tired and depressed!

Oh, where's my white knight on his white tiger ready to kick Marcus' ass and then carry me off into the sunset?

…Why'd I ever let him get away and why the hell did it take me 10 years to realise that I want to get him back?

I'm tired and sentimental, maybe I should go out this weekend with Eva and find myself another white night, prove to myself that Tommy Oliver is not the only man for me… the thing is, ever since I laid eyes on him, he's pretty much been the only guy for me.

Sure, I've dated, I came close to falling in love once or twice, maybe did once but not that immediate, thunder bolt that stops your heart every time you see him, not that burning longing when you can't be near him. There's only one man who's ever touched my senses like that and I let him get away… actually I threw him away, like a piece of rubbish. I ripped his heart out and then sent it back to him courtesy of air mail

Oh why is wisdom saved for the old?

And why have I been chasing his ghost ever since that day?

This really isn't the time or place for an in depth evaluation of my relationship with Tommy Oliver… or lack of ! I have work to do, and once these designs are finished I can submit them and then head home to begin the process of becoming human again

Stretching my arms over my head, I'm almost scared half to death by the slow wolf whistle that comes, apparently out of thin air

Leaping ungracefully from my chair I stand with my hands on my chest and my heart attempting to escape through my ribcage. Luckily I was built to last and my ribcage does a pretty good job of keeping my heart in place.

"Oh no…"

Did I say that out loud?!

The look that crosses Marcus face tells me I did and then in a heart beat the slimy smile is back in place and I'm feeling as crepped out as I've ever felt.

"Miss. Hart"

The words escape over his lips and I half expect to see slime attached to them, Ivan Ooze has nothing on this guy!

Can you believe that I actually dated him?

"Good to see that you actually do know the meaning of the word commitment, I was beginning to wonder"

I know he's not talking about work here but I'm not prepared to talk to him about anything else so I play dumb

"I'm always committed to fashion. What's going on anyways, did you set your alarm clock a couple hours early just to freak me out?"

"Yes Kimberly, my whole life revolves around freaking you out"

"It's not like you to be early"

"And it's not like you to actually see something through"

More double meanings, I'm not sure why he's actually here but I do not like the route this conversation is taking. Standing up, I inform him that I need to use the bathroom, what I really need is to get as far away from him as possible.

I'm walking past him and I just spot freedom on the horizon when he speaks

"So how was your little reunion thing in sunny Cali?"

I am so not doing this now, but I keep my back to him as I force myself to tell him it was fine… and yes, it was sunny

"We never got to talk about it when you got back"

That's because I dumped you, you creep!

But I say nothing, Instead I turn to face him and do I actually see a human being before me? The look in his eyes could almost be sadness. Na, I'm just tired… I'm imagining things

"There wasn't anything to talk about"

Marcus just nods and I wonder what on earth is going through that twisted head of his

"So you and your friend made up?"

Okay, I am so not talking to him about Tommy, I can't believe I ever felt close enough to him to tell him about Tommy and I

"I really have to go"

"I mean he is the reason you changed your mind about us isn't he?"

That's something I haven't even discussed with myself yet so I'm sure as hell not discussing it with him but when I look up to inform him that this conversation is over I see him smiling at me, creepiness coating his features

"Kim, I submitted your designs to Carter on Thursday, and he loved them, you really shouldn't be spending all this time redoing something that already got the go ahead"

Fire rips through my chest as he picks up my sketches

"They really liked the pink, I don't think these monochrome sketches would have impressed them at all. It's a good job we wont be using them- isn't it?"

And then he does the one thing he knows will get a reaction out of me, he slowly and purposefully rips the design in half

Anger and humiliation are now swallowing me whole and I'm either going to leave here now or he's going to leave here in a body bag

I consider things for a second or two which is a mistake because it gives him the chance to speak again

"Why don't you take the day off, we can't have you being seen in public looking like that now can we. Dungarees are never a good look"

I gulp twice, my hands are shaking. I know I could take him, I know I could, but I worked so hard to get this job and I know he's just trying to provoke me into giving him a reason to sack me.

If I killed him no one would ever have to know it was me I could get rid of him and keep my job…

Spinning around I walk out of the office, his laughter ringing in my ears. I walk through the offices, down the corridor, down 6 flights of stairs through the lobby and out into the street. As the fresh air hits my face, I'm half a block down the road before I realise that it's raining and I don't have a coat. The cold wind rips through my thin sweatshirt but I barely notice, instead I just walk and walk, tears now mingle with the rain and there's only one image in my mind. Tommy Oliver, with his arms wrapped around me keeping me safe from everything.


	9. The weakness in me

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing but the characters you don't recognise ( if you do want to borrow them just let me know, I'd be interested to see what you do with them)**

**CHAPTER 9**

Stepping out from my second shower of the day I wrap a large white bath sheet around my body and wonder if I will ever feel human again.

These last two days of continuous work have really taken it out of me.

My entire body is crying out from sitting hunched over my drawing board, my fingers ache from holding pencils and I have a head ache that a hundred aspirin wouldn't shift.

Turning off the bathroom light I move through my darkened apartment and end up in my bedroom, sitting on the side of my pink and cream duvet cover. I turn on the elegant cream lamp that sits on my pine bedside table and catch sight of myself in my full length pine-framed mirror.

Living alone isn't easy at times like this, times when you just want to come home to somebody you know will listen and never judge. To have somebody that will just wrap his arms around you and without saying a word make you feel like everything will be okay

…I had him

…I miss him

Berating myself for being pathetic I begin to pat my hair dry before loneliness and tiredness force me to drop the towel and pick up the receiver. Moving unconsciously through my contacts I don't even stop long enough to try and talk myself out of it. There's only one person that can make me feel better tonight and whether I know him anymore or not, I know that he's the only one who will ever know me… the real me.

As the dialling tone rings in my ear I find my heart racing in anticipation of hearing his voice

And as the dialling tone continues I find a fear creeping into my heart that he might not be going to answer. It is 9oclock on a Saturday night, which would make it… 6 where he is? Maybe he's out, maybe he has a date… maybe he's 'hanging out' with Katherine

"This is Tommy Oliver"

The warmth from his voice burns through the phone wire and causes my cheeks to glow pink, unfortunately, that warmth is what I've been missing and longing for and it causes my tough New York façade to crumble and tears are now spilling down my face

"Hello?"

Speak Kimberly, speak before he hangs up. Stop crying you wimp and just speak

Breathing deeply and wiping my eyes with the back of my hand I steady myself before speaking

"Hi Tommy"

Wow- way to knock him off his feet Kim!

"Hi Kim, are you okay?"

Two words and he's already reading me just like he always did.

I lift my legs up onto the bed and tuck my damp hair behind my ear. I can hear the sound of him breathing down the line and I'm surprised by how safe that sound makes me feel

"I'm fine"

"Have you been crying?"

Am I so obvious?! Again I tell him I'm fine and I hear him sigh as though he knows I'm lying but I'm relieved when he doesn't push it

"Rocky sent me a joke earlier, I can tell it to you but it might make you blush"

"If it involves the police, a helmet and some crayons he sent it to me too"

We both laugh and for a second I forget the horror movie that is my life

"I'm sorry for calling again so soon"

Hi voice is so soft when he replies that it makes me wish I still had the ability to teleport, I'd be in Reefside and his arms before he even had the chance to object

…After 10 years would he object?

…Could I bare it if he did?

"Kim, you don't ever have to apologise for calling me, actually I was lying here thinking about calling you"

Okay, that got my attention

Clearing my throat I ask him if he's in bed

"No, it's still early, I'm lying on the sofa, there's a documentary about a mummified dinosaur they found, it probably sounds boring but I've been dying to see it for ages"

"It doesn't sound boring, it sounds like part of this new Dr. Tommy Oliver I'm yet to know"

In truth is it doesn't sound boring because I'm too busy fantasising over this new, adult Tommy, the one with short chocolate spikes, stretched out over his sofa, hopefully wearing a pair of jeans and nothing else. Tommy is definitely maturing like a bottle of fine wine- getting better with age.

He had looked amazing at the reunion, whether it was in the black tailored suit he arrived in or the faded blue jeans and figure hugging grey t-shirt that I found him wearing as he raided the vending machine in the hotel corridor following a night of drinking and dancing that ended with me pressed tight to his body as some moody woman sang about the weakness in her, I knew then that I'd definitely found the weakness in me.

That encounter and the fact I ended my dalliance with Marcus soon after are not two completely unrelated events

"So, how have you been?"

"Can we pretend I've been fine and move on to how you've been?"

I can almost see him dark eyebrows drop in concern but I'm tired and emotional and all I want tonight is for him to make me feel normal

"Do you promise that you'll call me when you're ready to talk?"

I smile as I make the promise

"Okay, I've been fine, I've had classes to teach and essays to grade…"

"And Katherine to hang out with"

Its out of my mouth before I can think better of it and before I know it my heart's hammering in anticipation of the answer

"…Yeah"

Yeah? …Yeah?! What the hell does that mean? Yeah is not the answer I wanted here, it's not even a proper answer it's… what does it matter? He's a single guy he can 'hang out' with whoever he wants.

Tiredness washes over my body and the phone in my hand suddenly feels like a ton weight

"Kim…"

I'm far too tired to go any further with a conversation that I started

"Tommy, forget I said that, I apologise, it's none of my business who you do or don't… 'hang out' with I'm just tired"

"Are you sure you don't want to talk about it, I have really good listening skills, I may not remember a word you said but I listen really well?"

The sincere concern in his voice just makes me long even more for the man I gave away but I'm painfully aware that he doesn't exist anymore. Dr. Tommy Oliver isn't my Tommy and I really don't know who he is. I just have to deal with that and move on.

Eva and I are definitely going out on the town… just as soon as I stop making a fool of myself in front of Tommy and get some sleep.

"Tommy, I'm really tired, I've had a really long couple of days, I'm sorry for calling you just to invade your privacy and then run but I really have to go"

"Kim you haven't… you don't have to go"

"I do, before I make an even bigger fool of myself"

"You're not a fool"

…Only for you Tommy, only for you

"I have to go"

"Well can I call you tomorrow, just to make sure that you're okay?"

I know that tone, it's the 'I'm being polite and making this sound like a question even though really it's a statement of intent' tone .

I'm too tired to argue

"I'll speak to you soon Tommy"

"I'll speak to you tomorrow… early"

I hang up the phone and immediately find myself drowning in regret and loss

… I thought I was over this.

…I have to make myself be over this

… starting tomorrow


	10. A twist of fate

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing but the characters that you don't recognise**

**CHAPTER 10**

Staring in shock at the 50-something principal that is sitting seductively on the desk before me I wonder what it is about me that attracts these demented older woman.

I'm a science teacher for crying out loud, science teachers aren't supposed to be anybodies 'flavour of the week', but some how I've turned into a poster boy for the older, unhinged principals at my school and it's really starting to freak me out

The latest one is Principal Cartwright, she's tall, skinny… old, and wearing a denim skirt that is too short, a pale blue t-shirt that is too low and as she stares down at me I wonder if she's trying to attract me with her eyelid aerobics or whether she's developed a really nasty twitch.

The fact she is slowly running her tongue over her brightly painted lips as she stares down at me with a eyes half open/half shut look, answers my question and I suddenly regret the fact I had a large breakfast.

"Principal Cartwright, it's Sunday, and I'm sure you can appreciate that I have other places to be, so if you could please get to the point"

"Dr. Oliver, how would you feel if I told you that you and I are going away together?"

If I'm sick now will she sack me?

I attempt to keep the look of repulsion off of my face but I can feel the blood draining from it and heading towards my feet.

This is a joke…right? She has dragged me into town on a Sunday morning to play some kind of sick joke on me.

Ha-ha-ha, now can I go home please?

"Uh…what?"

I don't have times for games, I told Kim I would call her and if I don't do it this time I know for sure she will never forgive me and the thought of that troubles me more than it should

"There's a school conference, Dr. Philips was supposed to be coming with me, but as I'm sure you've heard he's having some problems with his wife right now. She's 10 years younger than him you know, I've seen them together and I can tell you…"

"Principal, please, I have somewhere I really have to be. I appreciate the offer but I can't go"

"It would be a great opportunity for you to network"

"Networking's not really my thing,"

Actually, socialising of any kind isn't really my thing, wasn't when I was young, isn't now I'm old

"We'd have three days in which to get to know each other better, that can only be of benefit to the school. I know next week is short notice but I've managed to get cover for all of your classes"

If she keeps talking like this I'm fairly sure we're going to be saying hello to my eggs and toast sometime soon

"Next week? Aw man, I can't, I'm really sorry Principal. Cartwright"

"Please…"

Her hand's on my shoulder of my red/orange t-shirt and I'm fighting the urge to pick it off and give it back to her. I wish I'd worn a jacket, or a thick coat… two of them, anything to stop her looking me up and down like that

"Tommy, call me Alicia"

She's now running her fingers through her orange hair and grinning manically at me… I think her hair is naturally that colour but I really can't be sure, would anybody _**choose**_ to dye their hair the exact colour of a fruit?

I have to end this craziness and get out of here, either that or wake up and find this has all been a really weird dream

"My girlfriend's a dancer and she has a show running next week, I promised I'd go every night for support I can't get out of it. Sorry"

I stand to leave but her hand is on my shoulder again only this time it's firmer and it's pressing me into my seat

"You're going to give up an all expenses paid trip… that includes flights, hotel- for _**two**_ nights along with the opportunity to rub shoulders with some of the top dogs in our profession -for a dance recital?"

Kat would have scratched her eyes out by now if she'd heard her refer to her staring role as… 'A recital'. Maybe I'll tell her later, just to witness her reaction

I shrug my shoulders and give her a 'what can you do' look

"It's a real shame Tommy…"

"Please, call me Dr. Oliver"

I'm not being obnoxious but the sound of her saying my name is really starting to creep me out, especially the way she draws it out so it sounds twice as long as it actually is

"Dr. Oliver"

Her sudden change in tone tells me she thinks I was being obnoxious

"I suppose New York will just have to do without you"

Wait a second, hold up.

…Did she just say New York?

As in New York, New York?

As in Kimberly?

My hearts pounding as one half of my brain fights with the other.

The words 'I'll go' are pummelling my lips in an attempt to break free, but I have to think about this.

At dinner the other night I promised myself no more flirting with Kim, no more holding hands and skipping down memory lane… not that we've had the opportunity to hold hands, not since the dance floor at the reunion anyways. Part of me hates that I went, part of me wishes I could forget the feel of her hand in mine or her body pressed tight against me. What was the song that was playing? … I can't remember but I do know it reminded me of Kim.

I also told myself that if she called again I would be honest with Katherine and tell her who it was.

Okay, I kind of didn't tell her Kim called last night but I couldn't go to New York and not tell her… could I?

God, no!

I can't believe I'm even thinking about it…

I guess if I was to go, I could tell her where I was going and ask her if she would mind if I called Kim and maybe caught up- I have to go for work anyways so why not make the most of it?

"Dr. Oliver, I'm sorry for wasting your time, especially on a Sunday, you're free to leave"

"It's a lot to think about right now Alicia, can I give you my answer tomorrow?"

"I thought you said your answer was no"

"Did I? Jeez, it's my memory you know… in one ear and out the other"

I stand and consider shaking her hand but the thought that she might take it as a come on causes me to take two steps away from her instead

"I'll let you know tomorrow ok, after I've spoken to Katherine"

The smile that snakes across her thin lips lets me know she's got completely the wrong idea about my change of mind but I'll deal with that later, for now, I'm out the door and heading to my jeep, a million thoughts all playing in my head at the same time


	11. Promise me

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing **

**CHAPTER 11**

"Tommy… I really don't want you to go"

I bite back my frustration and smile my most patient smile

I've spent all day teaching children about Geology

I've spent all evening teaching children karate

And now it looks like I'm going to spend all night watching my girlfriend do her best impression of a child…

Massaging the space between my eyes I tell her 'fine, I won't go' but she just huffs at me and then turns back to the cartoon she has playing on silent, the same cartoon i know she would never watch in a million years

Sighing, I ask Katherine what the matter is. I thought the thing she would be most upset about was the fact that I would be missing her 'big moment' but apparently it's not that, as she's assured me ten times already.

I know what the real problem is, but i give her the chance to explaine anyways

"I don't want you to go to New York"

I cross my arms over my chest and inform her that I've already said I won't go but she simply shakes her head and turns back to the T.V.

For a further 5 minutes we sit in silence and I'm just beginning to question whether I have actually gone deaf and just haven't realised it when Kat turns back to me and says my name. The look on her face tells me I might be about to wish I actually was deaf, but I sigh again and then dutifully ask her 'what?'

"I don't want to be a possessive girlfriend"

I tell her she isn't, but she's just about to lose my attention to the T.V where a cartoon character with a head shaped like a football is silently intriguing me

"And I understand that it's work and it's a fantastic opportunity"

"But?"

I know there's one coming, we might as well just get it out of the way now, before that kid with the funny shaped head gets eaten by that he/she with pig tails

"It's New York"

"So great they named it twice"

My attempt to break the tension with humour falls flat as she again turns away from me and I fall back into a word of silence. I know what's bothering her, she doesn't want me to go to New York because that's where Kim is and as far as Katherine's concerned me being on the same planet as my ex-girlfriend is two planets too close. I fully understand her insecurities, but she has to know that I'm not the type of guy that would do anything to purposely hurt her. Yes I might flirt with my ex-girlfriend on the phone some times but I would never act on that flirtation. I've been on the receiving end of that kind of betrayal and I would never subject somebody else to it.

"Kat, is this because of the show or because Kim is in New York?"

She looks at me as though she can't believe that I even had to ask the question and I shrug as I say

"It's only Kimberly"

The look that crosses her face tells me that I couldn't have said a more wrong thing if I'd told her that I like to wear pink spandex at weekends

"Only Kimberly?! Tommy, are you out of your mind? Do you actually remember what happened the last time we were together and 'only Kimberly' showed up?"

Hmm… she might have a point there, and I might have just landed myself in a conversation that I really don't want to be part of

"Kat, nothing happened after Muranthians, you know that"

"Maybe not, but we were never the same after it, you were always off somewhere, or too busy to call"

I can either attempt to talk my way out of this or I can pretend that the conversation didn't just sneak down this horrible alley, somewhere off memory lane. I decide on the latter

"So… I'm not going to New York huh? Well I'll just let 'Creepy Cartwright' know tomorrow then and we can just forget this ever came up. Coffee?"

I attempt to quickly escape to the kitchen but Kat grabs my arm and pulls me back down on to the sofa

"Tommy, I know you never felt the same for me as you did for her… back then"

Now would be a really good time for the phone to ring, or for someone to knock on the door

"I know I was always sort of a… 'replacement' for her"

Why is there never an attack on the planet when you need one?

"I knew it all along, I guess I just tried to fool myself because I cared about you so much"

And are we not well over due for a torrential downpour? There's nothing like watching all your worldly goods floating by to act as a conversation stopper, and I really need to stop this conversation…now!

"So that's a no to New York then… bummer. Never mind, jeez I'm tired…"

"Promise me that you're over her"

Please God… please help me out of this and I will never take your name in vain again. I haven't even had time to think about this myself, I can't promise things I don't know the answer to

"Tommy…?"

Realising that I'm not about to be rescued by divine intervention all I manage is a stutter

"She was my first love Katherine… it was…it was years ago"

It's not a lie

"It's just… at the reunion I kind of got the feeling that people were expecting you to leave with her not me"

"Jason has no love life of his own so he likes to make up stories about mine… most of them involve me and Kimberly getting back together… it's a hobby to him"

But I can't admit that I wasn't hoping for the same thing. When Kim had caught me raiding the vending machine in the early hours there'd been a moment… I could have kissed her, she could have wanted me too, but I was a coward and the next night I was doing shots with Katherine and now…"

"Promise me you won't meet up with her whilst you're in New York"

My stomach drops like a stone

Did she just say _**promise?**_

…As in one of those things you're never supposed to break?

"Kat, Kim will be really hurt if she finds out I was in New York and never even called her to go for a coffee"

"How will she know?"

Oooh… that's right, I never did get around to telling her that Kim had called, I guess now would be a really good time to do that…"

"Promise me Tommy"

...Promise?

"I promise"


	12. Reflections

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing**

**CHAPTER 12**

Standing before my mirror I carefully examine my handiwork and I have to admit, I look good!

This last week has been more horrendously awful than almost any other that I've had to endure, but tonight I'm wearing the highest heels that I can safely manoeuvre in without fear of unscheduled humiliation and a dress that's short, but not short enough to condemn me to the 'ladies of dubious professions' table… Tommy Oliver would beg at my feet if he could see me

I cringe as his name slides so easily through my mind, I'm supposed to be in the process of 'getting over' him for the second time so thoughts like this… really aren't helping

I mean, it's not like I seriously thought anything could happen at the reunion, as I remember all I was hoping for was that he would talk to me, which he did… after the initial yelling, then I found myself hoping he would dance with me… which he did, and then hold me… which he did and by the time I went back to my room that night I found my head filled with all kinds of ridiculous thoughts and unfortunately, I haven't been able to shake them since.

If I thought ten years was long enough for time and distance to dampen my feelings for Tommy Oliver I was dead wrong. Instead, it feels like I've spent ten years drizzling petrol onto a bonfire and one encounter has been all it's taken for my entire being to go up in flames

I take a second to clear my mind and then replace all thoughts of _**him**_ with all the possibilities a night out with Eva might bring.

For ages we've been saying that we would do this, but what with work, and then the reunion, and then all the drama at work after the reunion, there just hasn't been a good time, but as I apply my first coat of clear lips gloss I get the feeling that tonight- will be a good time, and then my eyes catch sight of the discarded photograph laying next to a white envelope on my bed and I actually 'huff' out loud

Stupid reunion!

Stupid Jason for thinking it would be a good idea

Stupid me for going

And stupid, stupid Tommy for turning up

Plopping myself down onto the duvet I pick up the photo that Trini thought I _**just had **_to see, it's of Tommy and I at the reunion, and yes, I kind of do agree with Trini when she says we still make a good looking couple, unfortunately, there's a hell of a difference between looking good, and being good. Tommy and I love each other, but we hurt each other, it never works, the night after Muranthians is testament to that

Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!

…But oh so pretty…

I trace Tommys grinning outline with my French manicured nail and find myself grinning back at him

Stupid Trini!

Stupid photo!

Pouting, I curse God for making him so perfectly

His brown hair is spiked perfectly

His chocolate eyes are the perfect way to drown

His gorgeous, full lips are the perfect things to kiss…

And that suit…

My 'inner cave-girl' roars but I know this is getting me nowhere. He's thousands of miles away, living a life that has no place for me, and yet does somehow have space for Katherine. Although I am yet to determine how big of a place she is occupying in his life right now because Aisha's playing dumb and Jason no longer knows of anyone by the name Tommy Oliver, although he does seem to remember he had a 'Dr. Oliver' once, right about third grade… go figure!

Stupid replacement girl!

…Stupid friends!

Dropping the photo back onto my bed I return to the dressing table and begin applying lip gloss layer number 2.

My heart feels a heaviness I was hoping to avoid tonight but smacking my lips together I wonder what the hell I'm doing in here reminiscing when I should be out there, forgetting

**A HOTEL ROOM**

Slamming the door behind me and then throwing my bag onto the floor I- I actually growl! I've just endured the most horrific flight of my life and now I'm trying to decide whether to shower first or burn my clothes

I'm six foot tall, so as you can imagine, folding myself into the tiny space you're allocated on an aircraft isn't the most easy or comfortable thing for me to do, but couple that with being sat next to a woman who feels the need to stroke your arm or your leg every time she talks to you and you'll start to realise why, at 4:30 pm I'm heading straight for the mini bar

I can't believe I have 2 days of this to endure!

I thought reminding her… about a hundred times that I have a girlfriend would curb her enthusiasm for touching me but apparently not

Pouring myself a beer I begin to wonder what the hell I'm doing here in the first place

I didn't want to come, I told Principal Cartwright right from the start that I'm not one of lifes 'networkers' but then she seduced me with talk of New York, playing with my eternal 'interest' in Kimberly… but it turns out that I can't even see Kim!

I can't believe I made that stupid promise.

I know I'm just giving in to Katherines insecurities, I know I should have been more of a man and just told her that Kim is my friend and if I want to go for coffee I will, but the guilt I still carry from all of those years ago causes me to continuously give in and back down over

Sitting on the edge of my bed I rest my head in my hands and sigh at the complexities of life

Up until the reunion I hadn't seen Kim in ten years and I wonder how many times my guilt over Katherine stopped me picking up the phone and calling her, how many times it caused me to back out of arrangements I'd made with my friends when I heard Kim was going to be there.

There was a time when the only emotions I felt regarding Kim and my relationship with her but good ones, sappy ones even, but now I find myself tangled in guilt, and confusion and eternal longing, but when I started dating Katherine again I made a commitment to her and a promise to myself that I would never walk the broken road I walked in my teens and I would never dance with the devil the way I did after Muranthians

The sound of bony knuckles tapping at my door jolts me from my heavy thoughts and I immediately know who it is

Should I ignore her?

I consider throwing myself through the hotel window and taking my chances with the 10 floor drop rather than subjecting myself to another pawing but then I decide to take the course of action that had lead me into this situation… I lie!

"Who is it?"

Like I don't already know

"It's Alicia" she coos

"Sorry, I can't open the door right now, I'm just out of the shower"

It's out of my mouth before I realise the images I've just given her and I silently berate myself for being so dense at times

The 30 second silence that follows is the longest, most uncomfortable of my life

"I don't mind if you don't"

My stomach turns as I actually consider being sick…

"…actually I do. What was it you wanted?"

"Just to let you know that I've made dinner reservations for tonight, the cab will be here at 7 so I'll meet you in the lobby "

I explain that it was a nice thought but I'm exhausted after the flight, I tell her I'm just going to order room service but the silence tells me she had the sense to drop the news and run

Opening the beer bottle in my hand I wonder how the hell I'm going to last two days with 'Creepy Cartwright', an then I realise that my bigger concern should be how I'm going to last 2 days without breaking my promise to Kat


	13. Of all the bars in all the world

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing**

**CHAPTER 13**

"Tell me why we're here again?" Whines Eva whilst twirling a black curl around her finger and sipping suspiciously at her strange… pale blue cocktail

Sighing, I return to my bar stool and inform her (for the third time) that we are here- at Alfonsos, sitting amongst dozens of couples, old enough to be my grandparents because for some bizarre reason I just couldn't walk past the place

"Well we've managed to walk past it every other time we've come out. In fact, I'd go so far as to say that we've avoided 'Alfonsos- bar/restaurant for the old and nearly-dead' fairly successfully these last couple of years. Why do you have to go and change things tonight?"

I sigh again, and don't even attempt to offer up an explanation

It's ridiculous…

And this place is horrendous! It's decorated like some really bad, 70s movie, and this margarita that I'm holding onto as though my life depended on it? It cost me 3 times what it would normally cost, but for some reason I just couldn't walk past. It was as though the building lassoed my soul and made it impossible for me to walk in any direction other than this one… Eva hasn't stopped going on about it since!

"In fact" she continues, her cheeks now pink with alcohol "I seem to remember _**you **_telling _**me**_ that you would never _**ever**_, date anyone that had so much as set foot into Alfonsos"

"Well I guess that means we'll have to cancel Saturday then huh?" I say it in my most suggestive tone and then I drag a finger down her cheek causing us both to collapse into fits of giggles, something which earns us the frowns of most of the diners

"Kim… I smell old people, they're everywhere! please say we can leave, please, please, please!"

I feel sorry for her, I really do because when we decided to do this, I'm sure the last thing she expected was to be sat in a bar/restaurant that our parents would describe as 'hip'- but for some reason, the thought of leaving fills me with more dread than I'd felt when I realised that we were actually going to come in here

"Sure" I say it not knowing whether I mean it or not "Let's finish these and then we can find some place else, somewhere we can kick back, listen to live music and hopefully attract the attention of some really cute guys

"Speaking of cute guys, are you going to tell me what happened at your reunion? I know you were worried about going because your ex was going to be there, was it really terrible?"

I feel my soul growl at the mention of tonights 'forbidden subject' but I shrug nonchalantly and decide on telling her my 'fairy tale of woe' as I've now christened my relationship with Tommy

"He yelled at me… a lot" I cringe at the memory of Tommy towering over me, his face almost as red has his Turbo suit whilst he berated me for my cruel treatment of him. 10 years may seem like enough time to heal all wounds, but as I found out in Reefside, Tommy Oliver wounds deep and heals slow

"Jerk!"

Good old Eva, taking my side, even when I was the one in the wrong, I knew there was a reason I hired this girl, oh that and she had the most amazing Prada handbag…

"And then he told me he forgave me""About time too, what, 10 years isn't enough time to get over being dumped?!"

"And then he danced with me. Eva, he held me so tight…" I close my eyes in an attempt to recapture the moment, the way his arms felt, wrapped around my waist and the way he smelt "And he told me I was more beautiful now than I was when I left him"

"Oooh… that is so sweet, where did you find him, I want one!"

"And then I bumped into him in the early hours of the morning, after we'd been drinking and dancing, he was scavenging for snacks and there was a moment"

"There was kissing and you didn't tell me …what kind of girl are you?!" Eva narrows her eyes and then dramatically turns her head away in disgust, leaving me with a face full of black curls

"No, there was no kissing, Eva, it was more than that, it was… it felt like I was breathing in magic dust or something, just like it did the first time I laid eyes on him"

"Magic dust? Girl, you need to be careful, I hear that stuff is habit forming" Eva giggles and drains the last of her drink, I sigh and knock back the last of mine. I don't tell her that I've been hooked on Tommy for my entire adult life, I don't tell her that I've been in withdrawal ever since I got back

"So, are you seeing him again?"

"We've talked a couple of times on the phone, but the last time it was really weird. It was like he couldn't wait to hang up. He did tell me that he was 'hanging out' with an ex girlfriend, but I just can't help thinking there's more to it than that and she is the reason he was acting so strangely"

"An ex-girlfriend of his or yours?"

"Both, I dated him, Kat and I were friends then she dated him and all of a sudden Kat and I are definitely not friends"

"Awkward"

"More than you will ever know"

Shaking my head at the memory, I find the courage to verbalise the thoughts that I've slowly been coming to terms with

"I just have to accept that our moment has passed, you know? I have to let him go… for good this time"

"No, what you need to do is get your self back to Cali, kick the ex's ass and then ride off into the sunset with this guy that I've never met but feel like I know because he is branded on your soul"

"I just want him to be happy"

Eva places her glass onto the bar and then looks into my eyes with such intensity I wonder if she actually can see into my soul

"Kim, if you can't be happy without him after all of these years do you really think that he can truly be happy without you?"

No, no, no this is too much thinking and there wasn't supposed to be any thinking tonight!

There was supposed to be alcohol, and guys that aren't Tommy. Eva was supposed to take my mind off of this but here we are talking about him, and thinking about him and now I really, really want to get out of here and get lost in some crappy band whilst knocking back beers and flirting with any guy that doesn't look like _**that **_guy

"Okay Eva, promise me we wont talk about Tommy again tonight and we can go"

"I promise"

I'm just standing up from my barstool when I suddenly begin to hallucinate.

I giggle loudly as Eva looks at me and screws up her face like I've gone crazy

"No wonder those drinks were expensive, they're laced with hallucinogenics"

"Kim, are you having a 'Margarita Moment'?"

I giggle again

"No, It's okay…I'm just going crazy, I could have sworn I just saw…"

And then the chocolate spikes I caught sight of as they entered the dining area turn and the eyes that skim over the restaurant can belong to only one person…

"Eva… I think I need to sit down"

**_*I mean no offense to old people_**


	14. Margarita madness

**_DISCLAIMER: I own nothing_**

**CHAPTER 14**

"Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God!"

Gripping my newly refilled margarita glass in my trembling hand, I watch Tommy and his 'Orange Goblin' companion make what looks like awkward conversation once more and then I spin in my seat and gaze down at the shiny brown bar, I can see my reflection in it and my reflection looks pale… very pale

"He's really here, in New York… my city… my guy…"

Amazement and excitement sparks in my stomach

"But he didn't call. Why wouldn't he call?"

Hurt and confusion declare a war on my soul as I raise my head and gaze at the beautiful African-American woman that has just poured my drink. Once again I am in search of the answer that has eluded woman through out the centuries of time

"Why are all guys jerks?"

She raises an eyebrow in surprise at my question and then echoes Evas sentiments when posed with the same question just days before

"Genetics?"

A half laugh wriggles its way free

"I guess I was the only one that missed that science class"

Glancing over my shoulder again I catch sight of Tommy smiling, he's faking it- I can tell immediately, his eyes aren't shining like they do when he really smiles at you. Memories burn at my chest and then for what seems like the hundredth time since he took his seat he gazes at his mobile phone. The look on his face is one I can't read and it only serves to irritate me more, there was a time when I could read Tommy Olivers face easier than a childs fairy tale book but now…

"Sorry about the poorly timed bathroom break"

Eva thumps her self down onto the stool next to me and immediately reaches for her freshly mixed cocktail. This time it's the most sour shade of green I have ever seen in my life and as I watch the 'Orange Goblin' reach over and straighten Tommys tie the jealousy that threatens to propel me from my seat and in their direction also threatens to turn me the colour of Evas drink. Not wanting to draw attention to myself just yet I turn back to face the bar

"Want to tell me what your little freak out was all about back there?"

"I didn't freak out"

I say it in between big gulps of my drink and as I fight to stop myself looking over my shoulder again. The dramatic look of disbelief that crosses Evas face is comical to say the least

"You're kidding me right?"

"I just felt… light headed. I must have stood up too soon, these stools are high for someone the height of me, I blame the altitude"

"Kim, we were just on the verge of breaking out of this cemetery when you turned into the whitest white girl I know and literally collapsed back into your seat"

And the award for over dramatising a situation goes to…

"I did not collapse"

"No it was just the altitude of the stool right?"

"Exactly"

"Whatever, so, what's the drama?"

Leaning closer to her I fix her with my most serious look, and then close my eyes before speaking, because honestly, I can not believe that I am going to say this

"Eva"

Fixing me with an equally serious look she says

"Kim"

"What would you say if I told you that Tommy was in here?"

Snorting she throws herself back on her stool and sips at the luminous liquid

"I'd say you have a really lousy choice in men if the one you've supposedly loved since you were 16 comes all the way from California to New York only to decide that this is a good place to hang out"

I pull a face

"He's with an older woman… a much older woman, it figures that she'd feel at home here and Tommys a gentleman so he wouldn't say no"

Her greenish-blue eyes that are framed by thick black lashes narrow as her drink-raising-hand stops just short of her crimson painted lips

"So he's actually here?"

No wonder I couldn't walk past this place tonight.

I just nod

"And you're serious?"

"As Marcus's breath problem"

We both giggle at that before Eva leans forward in her seat

"So… where is he? I have to warn you though, I've been waiting for years to lay eyes on this guy so if his good looks alone don't knock me off my seat I'm going to be sorely disappointed"

A smile lifts one side of my mouth, safe in the knowledge that no one will ever be disappointed by the way Tommy Oliver looks

"Eva, look out there, he's the only person under the age of 40- you can't miss him, oh that and he's super, super cute"

The burning in my chest is back as both Eva and I turn to ogle the eye candy.

I watch her eyes scanning the sea of elderly diners and when they suddenly widen to the size of car tires I know she has spotted him

"O-M-F-G!"

I giggle at her response and then take the opportunity to ogle him myself

"Kimberly, he's gorgeous!"

"I know"

I say it with pride but I don't know why, he's not mine to show off anymore

"So what are you doing sitting here with me? Go rescue him from that lecherous… weird looking… do you think her hair is naturally that colour because… why would you choose to dye it that colour?"

Turning again to face the bar I take a sip of my drink before dropping my head to rest on my palm

"I can't Eva"

More dramatic, disbelieving looks from my slightly buzzed friend

"I'm serious. We've been talking on the phone and he didn't mention anything about this, he didn't even call to see if I wanted to get a cup of coffee, I don't know why but he obviously doesn't want me to know that he's in town"

My hurt must be evident because Eva reaches out and squeezes my shoulder

"He probably just got here"

"If he doesn't want to see me that's fine I just… I'm not going to force myself on him so let's just forget it okay? We'll finish these and then we'll go"

"Are you for real? Kim, it's Tommy… your Tommy! He's here, just like you wanted, girl, go sweep him off his feet"

"If he'd have wanted me to sweep him off his feet Eva, he would have called"

I down the rest of my drink and then noticing that Eva still has most of hers left I start out on a dangerous path as I order another.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

**AT TOMMYS TABLE**

Picking up my phone for what feels like the hundredth time this evening I again scroll through to the 'Ks' and then begin flicking backwards and forwards, the significance of my actions doesn't escape my attention

Katherine… Kimberly… Katherine… Kimberly… Kimberly…

I fight to stop myself from actually hitting the call button as Katherines blue eyes bore their way into my mind. Pleading with me… begging me to do the right thing by her this time

Sure I made a stupid promise jut to ease her concerns but did I make it knowing fine well that I would break it?

Did Katherine ask me to make it knowing that I would break it?

And what kind of games have the three of us got ourselves tied up in this time?

Again I flick

Katherine… Kimberly… Kat…

Bony fingers come to rest over my flicking hand

…Alicia!

"Dr. Oliver, is there a problem?"

I quickly drop my phone onto the table and then snatch my hands from under hers, laying them flat on my thighs

"No, there's no problem"

I feel like a naughty school boy that's been caught passing messages in class as she glowers across the table at me

"I didn't realise my company was less interesting than that of a mobile phone"

She's virtually pinning me into my seat with her sternest of gazes, it's the gaze that has 99% of the kids in our school terrified of her, now I understand why

"It's not you it's just… I've had this weird feeling ever since we came in here, it's like I've been here before or something, which I can't have because this is my first time in New York"

"And your phone…"

I shuffle awkwardly in my seat and then scan the room for the waiter that is hopefully bringing our drinks

"It's just… it made me think of someone I haven't seen in a while, I was thinking about calling them"

She crosses her arms over her narrow chest and it causes the cream sweater she's wearing to be pulled down low… far too low for my liking. I try not to openly cringe as the lace frill of her bra makes an appearance

"Making a phone call when you are out to dinner Dr. Oliver, it's hardly good etiquette"

Oh here we go, the 'It's rude to use your phone when you have company' speech that I've heard a million times from my mother. I'm just about to tell her to save her breath, I've heard it, I know it, when she goes and does the most bizarre thing- she smiles at me… properly, it's not forced, not lecherous just… genuine.

"Isn't this nice?" She asks whilst gazing over our surroundings

Nice if you're in the 'next to die' queue.

I think it! I don't say it, I think it. Instead I fiddle with the bottom of my tie and tell her it's lovely. I've built my life on lies this last week or so, one more won't hurt

"Oh, Tommy, honestly!"

Before I know it her hands are across the table and amending what ever mess I've just made with my tie and again I feel like a little kid and as a few of our fellow diners give me a knowing look I want to say out loud 'hey mum, cut it out will you'

Scanning the room again I wonder where the hell those drinks are, and the food, and my taxi home!

Just as I begin panicking that I'm out of my depth I hear a giggle that I can not have possible heard.

She's been invading my thoughts all day and now she's even invading my reality. I think Jason might have been right when he said I was going Kim-Crazy again

Putting my elbow onto the table and then resting my forehead on my finger tips I sigh- why does life insist on constantly kicking me in the ass? And then life throws me the biggest curve ball…

"Dr. Oliver?"

The voice causes the blood to drain from my entire body, and my heart to die in my chest

"Dr. Tommy Oliver?"

My head snaps up and I can not believe what I'm seeing

"Dr. Oliver… I can't believe it… is it really you?"

Kimberly Hart! My mouth flaps open and then closed, open then closed but no words make contact with the air. My heart is spinning as I try to work out what the hell is going on but the look on Kims face tells me I'm about to have no time to think because I'm in a whole world of trouble.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

**KIMS P.O.V**

The fact the colour has just drained from Tommys face makes me smile, I've caught him completely off guard which means he is putty in my hands.

Flashing him an angry smile that I know he will find cute I pull up a seat from the empty table next to us and place it purposely with its back to the Orange Goblin. Staring directly into Tommys eyes I cross my left leg over the right and when Tommys eyes linger on my exposed thigh for a couple of seconds longer than they should have I know I have him just where I want him

"Dr. Oliver…" I keep my tone cold and deliberate "My friend and I were just trying to work out the answer to a prehistoric question when I spotted you over here and I thought if any one is going to know it's going to be you because you're a doctor of fossils…"

I glance behind me as I say fossils and give his dinner companion the long up and down, just so she knows that I know Tommy would never touch her with a barge pole

"Hi" I say before turning my attention back to Tommy

"You are right?" I flash him my biggest smile and I see him physically cringe at what I'm going to say next… and so he should

"Uh… and what exactly was the question?"

I ignore the fact that he looks so cute when he's nervous and forge on, alcohol running through my veins, masquerading as liquid courage

"Why are all guys jerks?"

He blanches immediately and I'm just fighting a smile when I hear the goblin behind me clearing her throat as though she's about to speak. I dare her to annoy me today… I dare her

"Excuse me Miss, I really don't think that's Dr. Olivers field of expertise"

I lift my head and look over my shoulder, smiling at her as I do

"Sure it is"

Again my attention is back on the man squirming in front of me

"It's genetics… apparently and genetics is science... right, and apparently you're now a science teacher so… feel free to answer at any time"

"Kim…" His harsh whisper is daring me to push this further and one thing Tommy Oliver should have learned years ago is not to dare me. Unfortunately the goblin cuts in before I have the chance to say a word

"I really am going to have to ask you to leave before I get somebody to make you leave"

"And I really am going to have to ask you to shut your mouth before I make you shut it"

It sounds more vicious than I feel but I've had a hell of a week and this is making me feel so much better

"Kimberly! Alicia, I'm sorry about that, Kim and I do know each other"

I throw her a smug look just for good measure as Tommy clears his throat

"Would it be at all possible to have a moment alone right now?"

Out of the corner of my eye I see the smug look she has just thrown me, oblivious to the fact that it's her being sent on her way not me

"Alicia, please?"

The sweetness dripping from Tommys voice and the way he fixes her firmly with his dark eyes teaches me a lesson about Dr. Tommy Oliver that may come in handy, he isn't the inexperienced 18 year old he was when I left him, now it appears he knows his best qualities and how to use them to get exactly what he wants from a women

"Fine" she huffs. Like any women in the world could say no to those eyes "I'll just go and use the little girls room"

A thought plays on my mind, I know it's below the belt but I decide to go for it anyways

"And exactly how many centuries has it been since you were a little girl?"

"You have got to be the rudest woman I have ever met!"

Winking at her I tell her to tell it to the toilet and as she leaves I feel Tommys hand wrap around my wrist as he firmly pulls me towards him.

Game on!

I smell the musky cologne that has haunted my dreams since the reunion and feel his body heat burning the edges of my sanity, our faces are inches apart and even though I know I'm about to get the biggest lecture ever, it'll be worth it just to stay this close to him

"What the hell was that?"

"Nothing less than you deserved, coming here and creeping around my city without telling me"

I pout a little, and as his gaze hovers over my lips I'm thankful for the two layers of lip gloss

"I'm not creeping around, I'm here on work and you just severely offended my principle"

"She'll get over it, tell you what why don't I bring her an apple one day as a 'Kim says sorry gift'"

He sighs and releases my wrist slightly as his eyes drop to the table. I don't want them on the table, I want them on me! I've always been greedy for his attention, ten years without it has only increased my appetite

"Okay, okay" His eyes lift to meet mine and I'm sure I can see electricity sparking in them, I hope he sees the same in mine "Tommy I'm sorry, I was hurt because you didn't call I shouldn't have taken it out on your principal"

The waiter arrives and places a bottle of wine and two glasses on the table, we thank him as he leaves

"I'm sorry I didn't call but this was all really last minute" He fixes me with the gaze he just used on his little orange friend and I know I'm a goner.

Gazing at the bottle of wine an idea begins to spark in my slightly intoxicated brain. Looking down at my wrist I wonder if Tommy realises that he's yet to let it go.

Licking my lips I decide to take life by the horns as I lean closer to him and whisper

"Let's get out of here"

The sigh he lets out informs me that he's misread my intentions

"Kim, this isn't the time or place for games"

"Who said anything about games?"

Pushing myself to my feet Tommy finally releases my wrist and I miss his touch immediately. Reaching for the bottle of wine I see his eyes widen as the true intentions behind my statement hammer home

"Kim I can't"

Typical Tommy, always trying to do the right thing

"Do you believe in fate?" I ask it knowing that he does… or at least he did "Let's just go with it… see where it takes us"

I see something in his eyes that again I can't read- is it fear, excitement maybe? Or is that my wishful thinking?

I reach a hand towards the glasses

"So Tommy, what's it going to be, am I taking one glass or two?"

Before my hand can make contact with the glass Tommy has grabbed hold of them both , swept his jacket off of the back of his chair and is heading for the exit. With excitement burning in my stomach I cast a glance over at Eva who's grinning at me, giving her a thumbs up is my signal that the game is on!


	15. The dangerous path Part 1

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

**CHAPTER 15****(Part 1)**

"You could always take a picture you know- it'll last longer"

The playfulness in Kimberlys voice lifts my spirits whilst enticing me to play along

"Pictures never did do you justice"

I add a wink for effect and judging by the smile that has just crept over her mouth she saw it and appreciated it

Sitting on the cool grass that covers the abandoned park, with my slightly drunk ex-girlfriend stretched out beside me, having just ditched my dinner date and stolen a bottle of wine I wonder how I've made it through my life without times like these.

The spontaneity and excitement, not to mention the chaos that Kimberly Hart brings into my normally disciplined life is something that drew me to her right from the start, unfortunately, the knots she ties my entire being in is something I've had to learn to accept and to live with

The Kim I knew as a teenager lived her life more by actions than planning and the Kim I've recently become reacquainted with appears to have carried on in that tradition, but prehaps with more of a kamikaze edge, that's why for the last 10 minutes we've been sat on the grass in a darkened park with only a bottle of wine and two glasses for company, playing a game that Kim has designed to help us to get to know each other better, but as usual she hasn't thought this through, because if she had, she'd have realised the trouble this could lead to.

Unbuttoning the sleeves of my dark green shirt I push them up and then kick out my legs as Kim prepares to lead us down a dangerous path

"Okay…"

She pushes herself up so that she's leaning backwards with all of her weight on her arms and I turn to face her. The way her profile is illuminated by the moonlight sends me spiralling back in time and I wonder how I've made it through life without _**her**_

"Dr. Tommy Oliver…" The way she draws out my name and title makes all those years of studying seem worth it "Tell me something I don't know about you"

I try to tear my gaze away from the image of her stretched out on the black suit jacket that I laid down for her as naturally as I did when I was a teenager and again I hear the past calling out to me. Taking one of the glasses in my hand I ponder the question and try to decide how to play this

…To shock?

…Entice?

Maybe I should just use it as the opportunity to unburden myself of the half truths that have littered our recent conversations.

Pouring myself a glass of our stolen treasure my mind attempts to unravel the mysteries of my actions. For years I prided myself on always being the one to do the right thing… so why am I struggling to do it now?

"Wine?" I ask and buy myself a little more time. Kim shrugs and then turns to face me

"Why not, there's no one here I can offend but you"

We share a smile and then I begin pouring and decide to do what 27 year old Tommy Oliver has been doing for years… play it safe

"My memory still sucks" I hand her the glass and she gives me a 'you'll have to do better than that' look

"Excuse me but you're talking to the girl you didn't call back, I think I know that your memory is a black hole so come on, try again and this time shock me"

This is typical Kimberly, diving head first into things. I've lost track of the number of times I had to rush in and rescue her because she had acted first and thought later. It warms my heart slightly to realise that some things do stay the same

Sipping at the wine I try to decide the best way to shock her

…The Dino Rangers?

…Katherine?

"I got a tattoo"

I decide against saying anything that will cause her to leave

"Again you fail with the shock tactics, I knew you would get a tattoo"

I pull a disbelieving face which she mirrors and a lazy laugh escapes me as I shake my head at her childishness

"How did you know? Everyone else was shocked when I told them, I'm supposed to be a sensible science teacher you know, I have my own door plaque and everything"

"You told me when you were 17 years old you wanted a tattoo and by that time I guess I'd learnt that what 17 year old Tommy Oliver wanted he got"

I raise an eyebrow at her but don't give words to its meaning, the way her eyes drop to her wrist as she starts adjusting the thin silver bracelet she's wearing nervously tells me that she figured out the meaning on her own and I feel like I've achieved a small victory by making her blush. It serves her right for all the times she caused me to blush and stutter when I was younger.

Lifting her eyes to meet mine her voice is soaked in darkness as she asks what 27 year old Tommy wants and something sparks in me, it's a feeling I haven't had in years, a feeling that almost drove me to the edge of my sanity as a teenager.

"I want…" the darkness that drips from my own words surprises me

"…Yes?" Kim runs her tongue over her lips and then sips at the wine whilst I attempt to stop myself being pulled further into this ill advised game

"I want you…" Her eyes widen and I claim another small victory " I want you to tell me something that I don't know about you, oh and Kim… make it good"

A nervous laugh escapes her chest as a smile tugs at my mouth and then she gazes up into the night sky and the way the moonlight frames her face just acts as fuel for my fire

"I've thought about you every day since the reunion"

She doesn't turn back to face me and I'm thankful for small mercies because I doubt the 'jaw in your lap' look is an attractive one. I was so busy claiming my victories that I completely forgot Kims natural talent for turning the tables faster than anyone I've ever met in my life

Once I recover from the shock of her honesty I find myself unable to stop myself grinning. Her braveness is something I've always admired about her, in fact I guess I've always envied her for it- if she feels it she says it… not like me. If I feel it I hide from it, I analyze it and tie myself in knots over it but voicing it never comes easy to me, it didn't back then and it doesn't now

When I was a kid I guess it was my shyness that forced me to keep my feelings to myself but once I met Kim she pretty much dragged me out of my shell, she showed me a different world, taught me that the greatest gift was giving someone your heart and then having them give you theirs… that is until she ripped my heart from my chest and sent me running for cover. The day I lost Kim I learned a darker lesson and it was one that I never really recovered from, it caused me to pull back from everyone I knew and ever since I've been running from any kind of emotional contact. Physical contact I can deal with, giving my body is easy but giving my heart is impossible, a fact that has cost me almost every relationship I have entered in to since the demise of my first and most precious.

Gazing at Kim again I find it hard to believe that she could be responsible for such catastrophic damage. I told her at the reunion that I was over it but that doesn't mean that I don't still bare the scars of it and as the slow burn of white hot panic begins to singe my senses I find myself seeking out protection from the assault on my soul that simply being near Kim causes

"Yeah well I haven't stopped thinking about those little quiches that Aisha brought… those things were incredible, I don't think I've ever seen Rocky guard anything so aggressively"

I see her drop her head in disappointment at my answer but running for cover is how I make it through life these days. So much for the big bad superhero, I wonder what the fans of the Green/white/red/black Power Ranger would say if they knew he'd been defeated by a girl when he was only 18 years old

"Okay, my turn again" I'm trying to pull us out of this awkward moment but Kims eyes remain fixed on the wine glass she is swilling . This one has to be good, it has to regain me her attention "Something you don't know about me…" I'm still searching for the perfect thing to tell her when all of a sudden her eyes fly up and she eyes me almost like she doesn't recognise me and I feel myself frowning at her in confusion

"Tell me something that will surprise me"

Not shock… surprise, hmm…

Draining the rest of my drink I place the glass back onto the ground and find words slipping over my lips that I never expected to hear myself say- not to anybody but especially not to her

"I never went to Europe" The look on her face tells me where I failed to shock I succeeded to surprise "…It never felt right without you"

The way Kims eyes widen and then fall to her wine glass before settling back on mine tells me that she wasn't expecting that sort of honesty fallowing my earlier duck and run and the fact she doesn't answer immediately gives me time to decide whether I want to elaborate or not.

Travelling around Europe was a dream Kim and I shared as teenagers, I lost track of the number of hours we spent sitting by the Angel Grove lake talking about where we would go and what we would do once our time as Rangers was over. Kim wanted to go shopping in Milan and to see the tulip fields in Holland, I wanted to visit Greece, I always found Greek mythology intriguing but most importantly we just wanted to go there together, when Kim cut herself out of my life she took all the hopes and dreams of Europe with her

"Tommy I'm sorry"

Her voice holds a decade of regret but again I feel the panic rising and decide against going into details

"Your turn"

"You don't want to talk about Europe some more?" she finishes her drink and then immediately reaches for a top up

"There's nothing to say, it was a teenage dream and like a hundred others it didn't come true… just another one to add to the list"

"Another one I robbed you of"

I shrug at that, unable to deny it, instead I just repeat the fact that it's her turn to surprise me before taking the bottle from her and refilling my own glass

Kim doesn't answer for so long I wonder if she's decided to admit what we both know- this wasn't a good idea.

At first it had seemed innocent enough, some simple questions and statements that would help us to better understand the adults we had become but it should have been obvious from the start that we're still carrying too much baggage from the teenagers we **_were_** and what started as innocent has quickly spiralled into words with veiled meaning and heated glances.

Clearing her throat, Kim takes a large gulp of the wine and never lifts her eyes to meet mine which are gazing at her intently, wondering what has caused her face to pale and her entire body to tense up, as she sighs heavily I feel my heartbeat quicken as I realise she is struggling to find words. What is she struggling to say to me, and do I really want to hear it?

What she says next shocks me to the core and sends my entire world spinning out of control so violently that I know once it's stopped things will never be the same

"I regret what happened after Muranthians" She finally looks up to meet my shocked gaze "If I could go back and change things I would accept your offer… in a heartbeat"


	16. The dangerous path Part 2

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing**

**CHAPTER 15 ( Part 2 )**

Now standing a few yards away from Kimberly, I grip my wine glass fiercely and beg my senses for calm.

The 'M' word…

My offer… the one that causes guilt to burn in my soul every time I look at Katherine… I can't believe Kim is bringing it up now, I haven't had nearly enough alcohol for this…

For so long I have hidden from all thoughts of what happened, buried the memories so deep that there have been times when I've wondered if it really even happened at all but just the sound of the word crossing Kims lips has begun the unravelling of almost a decades worth of confusion.

She regrets saying no… after all these years I've spent regretting asking

Images of my most shameful and desperate night rip through my mind and for a second I'm consumed by the emotional pain that wounded me far more than any physical pain ever could.

The betrayal…

The rejection…

"Tommy…"

Even Kims voice isn't enough to pull me free of the tangled memories that now have hold of me like a vice around my throat

I see myself… young, and grappling with things I couldn't make sense of.

Jason and Kim were back, they were safe, the tournament was won, I should have been happy but I'd never felt more torn or tormented in my life.

It was late… the celebratory meal was finished, everyone had gone home but I found myself walking, I didn't know where I was going or why, all I knew was I couldn't stand still, I couldn't give my self time to think because if I thought then I knew without doubt I would fall apart

It was dark, and I could smell the dampness in the night air as I walked silently through the Angel Grove park, without knowing it I found myself standing on the spot where my life had truly begun and realised that I wasn't alone.

Kim wasn't surprised to see me and I wasn't surprised to see her. It was the first time we'd been alone since I stood with her at the airport just after Christmas, that was less than a year ago but the memory of it had burned as brightly as yesterday

We exchanged pleasantries, and shared a forced laugh about how much Rocky ate at dinner. It was all very civilised as we tried everything in our power to ignore the subject that is burning in my eyes and weighing on her mind that is until she bowed her head and informed me that she was going to be leaving first thing in the morning, that's when it all changed, that's when I became a desperate man

Stepping closer I grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her to me, it wasn't an aggressive gesture but I saw an emotion in her eyes that I didn't recognise and it had served to remind me of how quickly she was slipping away from me

I felt my heart hammering in my chest as panic tore through me, I couldn't bare the thought of her walking out of my life again, the fear screamed in my ear that this time it could be for good so I began begging her not to leave me, I promised her that I would do better, I'd leave Katherine and the team, I'd graduate and then move to Florida, I told her we could be together just like we had always wanted, we could travel to Europe as we'd planned if only she'd take me back.

The words tumbled from my lips in a mass of desperate agony, I was like a man up to his chest in quicksand trying frantically to grab at the one thing he knew could rescue him only instead of holding out her hand to me, she turned her back

Kimberlys silence had shattered any hope I still clung to that things could work out right.

I didn't need the whispered 'It's over' that she gave me whilst removing her arm from my grip and I didn't need to see the solitary tear that slid down her cheek as she moved away from me to finally know the devastating truth… I'd lost the one thing that I swore I would never lose

The offer I'd made to give up my entire life for a life with her had been turned down

"Tommy…"

My memories finally fall away as Kims voice drags me back to the here and now.

Without me knowing it, she is on her feet and now wearing the jacket that I'd lain down for her. The warmth of her hand as it wraps around my bicep evokes feelings I thought I'd put to rest a long time ago and as I gaze down at her I realise there is a very good reason I had tried to bury this

"Tommy I'm so sorry, It was a long time ago, I shouldn't have mentioned it"

And yet she did and now it's too late to pretend any different

"It's just… I haven't been able to stop thinking about that night, not since the reunion"

"Well I've spent the last 10 years trying not to think about it at all"

She releases my arm but I know it's too late for me because once again the feel of her skin on mine is emblazoned on my brain and every nerve ending in my body has just sparked into life

Setting down the glass I've been clinging to, I allow my vision to wander over the abandoned park.

There's grass… lots of it, and trees… everywhere, it reminds me of home, of calm

"Everything changed that night"

I didn't mean to keep talking about this and I don't know whether it's the wine or the familiarity of my surroundings but for some reason it feels right to tell her… even if I can't bring myself to turn around and face her again

"_**I**_ changed. It's funny, not in a ha-ha way but in the other way…. looking back I guess that conversation didn't just signal the end of us but it signalled the end of everything. It pretty much was the beginning of the end of my time as the leader of the Rangers, I guess I lost my focus"

I struggle with the truth, I wonder if I can trust her with it

"Without you… my heart just wasn't in it. I was always distracted, my mind was always somewhere else so it became easier for the bad guys to manipulate me, the spells they put on me lasted longer and were harder to break, I began making bad decisions… decisions that could have hurt my team. Zordon tried to talk me through it but it was too late, I think we both knew that I was already gone. Then there was Katherine"

The guilt that seems to follow her name burns bright but I keep my back to Kim, her admission has brought about my painful confession but I can't allow her to see me because then she will know that no matter what I said at the reunion… no matter what I've spent 10 years trying to convince myself, I'm not over this, I'm not over _**her**_, half an hour in her presence has made that painfully clear

"Kat tried so hard to make things work, she put up with a so much from me but after our conversation I just… I couldn't bring myself to look her in the eyes anymore, I felt so ashamed of how easily I'd offered to give her up and what made it worse is I knew I would have done it, if you'd have said yes I would have finished it without a second thought, so I began staying away, from Kat… from everyone. The only time I could forget was when I was in that car… racing around my Uncles track, that was the only time I felt okay"

"Tommy I'm so, so sorry"

Her words are saturated with emotion as I finally turn back to face her and the sorrow in her eyes causes me to want to reach out to her

"Why do you do this?"

I can feel my eyes burning into hers as I close the distance between us

"Do what?"

She asks it whilst pulling my jacket tight around her and for a second I find myself jealous of a piece of fabric

"Blow my world apart every time you come into it"

I reach down and tuck a stray strand of honey coloured hair behind her ear but never once break eye contact, for better or worse I want her to know the effect she has on me

"I guess Rocky was right when he nicknamed me the little K-Bomb then huh?"

She shrugs innocently and I can't help but smile, it's not just at the way she has always been able to make everything seem like it'll be okay but at the absurdity of this entire situation

"Tommy look… I'm not going to pretend that I didn't mean what I just said, but turning you down was my mistake and it's one I have to live with, I don't want that drag up bad memories for you, you're only in town for another 2 days so I'm sorry I lead us down 'Teenage Angst' road but let's agree on something"

I raise an eyebrow in question whilst pushing my hands into my pockets, it's colder here than I'm used to but I could no more ask Kim for my coat back than promise I will never be a ranger again

"It was the weirdest of weird coincidences that we ran into each other tonight but, I definitely think it was a good thing. We need some time alone after everything that happened at the reunion, right? To get to know each other again… without silly little Kim-games"

I nod in agreement

"…Some fun time"

And then my whole body goes tense as I consider what 'fun time' with Kim could mean

"I know a bar, it's really laid back, we could talk, listen to some music… have a beer"

"I really, really need a beer"

"So, what do you say Dr. Oliver, are you ready to partake in a little fun?"

She wiggles her eyebrows and loops her arm through mine and I'm this close to telling her that she has no idea of the things I'd partake in just to be near her but I don't, I just nod like the idiot she turns me into.

Craning her neck so that her lips are just inches from my ear she sends a shiver down my spine as she whispers

" I promise I wont get you into any more trouble tonight"

Lowering my head to hers I whisper 'spoilsport' before she starts leading us away and the easy, flirtatious conversation the night began with starts flowing once again

"So… Tommy, you don't look like you've got a broken finger so how come you didn't call?"

"Kim, how long have you been waiting to use that line on someone?"

"Oh, just about 11 years"

"So, are you going to tell me why you were upset when you called me the other night?, you did a good job avoiding it when I called you back"

"My boss is a jerk"

"Want me to kick his ass whilst I'm in town?"

"It's my own fault for mixing business with pleasure, but the story is too long and lacking in fun for tonight"

"You dated him? Now I'm definitely going to have to kick his ass"

We must look like just another young couple as we make our way out of the park and Kim leads us …somewhere, where? only tonight will tell

_***I'm not going to write what happens during the rest of the night, the next chapter will be set during the next day and it will be back to the normal light heartedness that i enjoy from this story, I just felt like I needed to explain a few things from the past before I moved things on… especially the complexities of Tommys relationship with Kat which are quite important to this story**_


	17. Somewhere between life and death

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing**

**CHAPTER 17**

Resting my head on the cool surface of my granite breakfast bar, I wonder why the hell AC/DC have chosen my head as the location for their latest, ear splitting gig

I close my eyes and swear to God that if I make it through today I will never ever drink again, and I mean it too, well… unless Tommy's there- but no shots… not ever!

…Not unless he gives me those huge brown eyes and that sexy half smile, then I can't guarantee I could say no to anything he asked of me

Oh this is so totally typical of me, sitting somewhere in between life and death and all I can do is drool over my ex-boyfriend.

And there's that word again- when will it ever get easier to put the words 'Tommy' and 'Ex' into the same sentence?

If I'm being honest though, he didn't exactly feel ex-ish when he slipped his arm around my shoulder as we searched for a cab last night, or when his eyes lingered on my lips as we said goodnight, I'm 27 years old, I know guys… and I know that look!

Oh my God, I'm 16 years old again… he's turning me into a helpless teenager and I'm just grinning and going with it

Damn him and his perfect-ness!

Damn me and my inability to know when to stop drinking!

Popping two aspirin from the packet I reach across the short distance to my fridge and retrieve a bottle of water

Water is the good drink, it heals you… and it doesn't hurt, which is always a good quality in a beverage, it's just a shame I forgot that last night.

The banging on my kitchen door which almost causes my head to combust shocks me so much that I reach for the first thing that I can get my hands on. The fact that it just happens to be a really ugly glass vase that my Grandmother bought me and insists on seeing every time she calls around unannounced is not a bad thing.

Hurling it at my wooden enemy I wait until I'm satisfied that it has successfully been defeated before I drop my head back onto the cold surface and wait for the aspirin to work their magic and bring peace back into my chaotic world

The tap tapping of finger nails on the glass of my kitchen window is the last thing I want to hear and as I lift my head enough to look over my shoulder I'm met with the grinning face of little Miss. Sunshine herself. Dropping my head in defeat I reach a hand over my shoulder and curl a finger at her, signalling that she can come in

"Oh…My…God, who killed Kimberly Hart and what on earth have they left in her place?""

I search my damaged brain for a witty retort but find only a grunt

"Morning to you too" She giggles and this time my grunt sounds more like a growl "…Although obviously it isn't a good one, what's wrong? Drink too much of the devils water last night?"

I nod and then finally find the strength to raise my head

"And what about Mr. Greek God himself? Did you guys make up for lost time? Is he here? Good God Kim, did he see you like this?! …Is he on the plane back to California as we speak?"

Great… torment a girl on her death bed- way to show your true colours Eva!

"No" I may not have made it onto full sentences but hey, at least it's a human word, not just a noise used by animals

Sitting opposite to me, Eva steals my water bottle and I don't have the strength to fight her for it

"So how was last night anyways?"

The returns the bottle to the counter top and I grab it as though I haven't had a drop to drink in days… oh God, how I wish that were the truth!

"Good"

"And where's Tommy?"

"Hotel"

"So I guess it wasn't that good then huh?"

"Was"

"Okay, okay. Kim, that's enough of the one worded answers, I want the gossip… all of it- especially the drunken parts! I'll tell you what, you go shower, I'll make coffee and then you can tell me all about it, oh and I have the most shocking news ever, I swear you're not even going to believe it"

I give her my best 'don't make me have to ask you what' face and she seems to understand

"Marcus might, just might have a heart"

I snort my disbelief

"That's what I thought but he's actually given us this morning off just so we can go shopping to pick you up something fantastic for tonight"

I struggle to determine which day it is… Thursday… I think, and then I struggle to work out what might be happening on a Thursday night. Nothing ever happens on a Thursday night it's ice cream and sofa night!

Eva obviously picks up on my confusion because she quickly fills me in

"Dinner… with the people behind the Sports Wear account… you and Marcus… plus one… he didn't tell you did he?"

"I'll kill him!"

And if my head wasn't weighing me down I would do it now!

"Kim, this is a really big deal, that account is worth a lot of money, not to mention the publicity"

"Yes I know that Eva, I won us that account remember? Oh great…"

More thoughts crash into my already fatally wounded brain

"What?"

"If Marcus turns up with a date and I don't I am never going to hear the end of it, it'll be just one more thing for him to torment me with"

"So find a date"

"Well I don't know if you've noticed but guys haven't exactly been queuing around the block to get a date with me recently. Ohhh… what do I do? Eva, what do I do? You're my P.A… assist!"

"You shower, we'll shop and just leave the guy trauma to me"

I give her my biggest eyes just to drill home how important it is that she doesn't mess this up

"Bathroom… now!"

**Next To The Pool Outside Of Tommys Hotel**

As my hands move through the air in what is a 'more familiar than breathing' kata, I find myself unable to control the child within me as I begin whispering 'wax on, wax off' through my deep breaths and then I grin at my good mood.

I really shouldn't be feeling this good.

For a start I went out on a week night- Katherine would just love to know that, and I drank… a lot, but for some reason I am completely free of the dreaded hangover. In fact my head feels clearer than it has in a long time, and I feel more like Tommy Oliver … the real Tommy, not the guy that hides behind the glasses and pompous titles but the Tommy that enjoyed nothing more than early morning katas by the lake and then sharing an exotic fruit shake at the juice bar with his friends.

I liked that Tommy- I've missed him!

Wax on… Wax off

I haven't watched that movie in forever!

I can't control the grin that separates my lips as I think about my 17th birthday when Kim rented all 3 movies and I remember how the entire gang squeezed onto my mothers couch. I smile bigger when I remember that Kim had been sat so close to me that I had struggled to remember which film we were watching at all

I'm going to hire it as soon as I get home!

Wax on… Wax off

"Hey Mr. Karate Kid"

The voice shocks me so much that I lose my footing and I end up flat on my butt

"Nice moves, but I really think you should work on the landing because graceful you aint"

Opening my eyes, I frown at the dark haired woman that has just shocked me from my memories and apparently my good mood too. I'm not graceful? She wouldn't be saying that if she knew that I used to be a ninja

"Everyone's a critic" I grumble before asking how I can help her

"Actually it's not me that needs your help"

"I don't do cryptic… I don't have the patience"

"So what _**do**_you do?"

The way the words slip over her lips makes it glaringly obvious that her comment was intended as a flirt, and although she is pretty, my head and heart are at their capacity.

Pushing myself to my feet I cross my arms over my chest and frown in a way that I hope tells her that A-she's wasting her time, and B- I am not in the mood for games

"Wow, you are Mr. Grumpy aren't you, what's wrong, hung over?"

Now was that a lucky guess or should I know this girl from somewhere? Studying her face I 'm fairly sure that I don't recognise her, but I can never be totally sure, not with my memory and there was a lot of alcohol last night…

"Do I know you?"

"I should be so lucky"

"Look, like you said, I really am Mr. Grumpy today so do you just want to get to the point… if you have one?"

"Fine…"

And then she says the four words that are always bound to grab my attention and spur me into action

" Kimberly needs your help"

_***I am officially in mourning following the removal of the best Tommy/Kim video on Youtube. It was to the song signal fire and it used footage from AJJ/JDF movies in a fantastic way …it was amazing… I am heart broken x**_


	18. Is it Tommy, Thomas or Tom?

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing**

**CHAPTER 18**

As I make my way up the stone steps to the restaurant that Marcus is no doubt holed up in, plotting my humiliation, I grin at no one in particular and decide that I have never felt more ready for war in my entire life- in fact I'm so ready for a fight that I might as well have turned up wearing pink spandex instead of this black designer suit with pale blue stilettos and matching fitted shirt.

I look all about business tonight and believe me, that's how it's going to be, I'm going to deal with business, get business over with and then get down to the serious business of kicking Marcus' ass!

I'm supposed to be meeting 'Tom', Evas cousin inside the restaurant but she assures me he'll be late- she's heard he's always late, I don't know what it is… maybe it's the name, maybe it's an official rule- no Tommy, Tom or Thomas may ever be on time for anything.

Images from last night snake their way into my mind and although I allow my self to smile at them, I quickly push them away- tonight is not the night for gooey thoughts of Tommy, tonight is the night for fighting!

…Oh and if Evas 'Tom' doesn't score at least 5 on my 'how cute is this guy compared to Tommy' scale I'm sacking her!

Okay, I have to try and calm down a bit, if I go in there all worked up, then Marcus will see that he's got to me and that'll give him the upper hand. Tonight I have to be cool, calm… totally professional, well until Mr. Gallas and his partners leave and then I will _**professionally**_ kill Marcus- honestly, I'm a trained ninja- I could kill him in the middle of a packed restaurant and no body would ever know it was me

Is the fact that these thoughts of extreme violence are making me happy considered a character flaw?

Is the fact I'm evaluating my character whilst planning to commit extreme acts of violence considered weird?

Huh! When was the last time I was considered normal? That's the real question, and the only question that I truly know the answer to… never!

Superhero by the age of 16, ninja by the age of 17, victim of attempted murder by the age of 18, sacrificed to a monster living in a volcano aged 19 -way to blow the roof off normal Kimberly Anne Hart of Angel Grove California

Swapping my black hand bag from one arm to the other I find a strange kind of melancholy washing over me. How exactly did things get this bad between Marcus and I?

There was a time when I thought we could really make a go of things, yes that thought did only last for a couple of months but still… when did he turn into the monster that I've been working for these last few weeks? When did I start feeling sick every time I saw him? When did the urge to hurt him so bad really start to take a hold?

I've got two words which answer all my questions- Damned Reunion!

Jason Lee-Scott has got a hell of a lot to answer for, and if I manage to avoid jail I'm going to let him know all about it!

I was happy with Marcus before I went to Reefside and I know that sounds crazy after everything that's happened since but I was!

He treated me well, took me to all the best places, showered me with presents… all things that had never meant anything to me, but at the time they were enough. That is until Tommy Oliver karate kicked his way back into my life.

It sounds weird… even for me, but even in the beginning when he barely said two words to me, or in the middle when he was stood yelling at me and making me cry I knew without doubt that no matter what changed in my life one thing would always remain the same, and that was my feelings for Tommy.

I didn't have a choice but to end things with Marcus when I got home, it would have been cruel of me to be with one man when I knew my heart would always belong to someone else. Of course, I didn't tell him the real reason behind our split but I thought he understood my excuses... It just won't work, we're too different, it's not you, it's me… yadda yadda.

He took it really well, in fact he didn't seem bothered at all, but that's when it all started- his crazy vendetta against me. I guess I must have damaged his fragile male ego or something and I totally understand that he's punishing me as a way to claw back some of his male pride but this time he has taken it too far.

Yes I love my job, yes I fought really hard to convince him to take a chance on me and he knows that, but today is the day when I re-claim my self-pride and say stuff you and your job… if that's what it takes… I really hope that's not what it takes, I love my job… I _**want**_ my job!

I'm really, really good at it, anyone will tell you that I've single handedly dragged a company that was stuck in the 90s into the 21st century but apparently in love and war that counts for nothing. Well tonight I'm going to show Marcus that Kimberly Hart stands for something

"Excuse me M' am, do you have a reservation?"

The man in the navy blue uniform has to ask me twice and then place his hand firmly on my arm- a gesture that almost earns him a kick in the nuts, but fortunately I shake myself free of my thoughts just in time to stop myself being thrown out, because without realising it I have walked right through the 'wait here to be seated' area

"Ah… yes, sorry, I was in a world of my own"

I bat my eyelids and smile at the middle aged man with greying hair and way too much cologne and I immediately notice his demeanour change from 'angry authoritarian' to 'middle-aged guy who thinks he could score with someone who is young enough to be his daughter'

"I have a booking under the name Brent, my name is Kimberly Hart"

"Ah, Ms. Hart, yes. The rest of your party are waiting for you"

"Waiting? But I'm 10 minutes early"

"The booking was made for 8 o clock Ms. Hart, it's now 20 past"

I deepen my breathing in an attempt to stop myself doing something that I will regret. Marcus will get his, I'm about to make sure of it!

"Shall I take your jacket?"

His hands are on my arms already and I'm just about to rip them from their sockets when I feel an arm slide over my shoulders, one hit of the spicy cologne and I know exactly who has come to my rescue

"It's okay man, I'll help her with her jacket, but you might want to move your hands"

The look of terror that covers the sleaze balls face tells me exactly which look Tommy is wearing and I feel the burn of pride that even after all this time he still feels protective towards me.

"Tommy, what are you doing here?"

I finally turn to face him and I swear to God, I have never seen a more beautiful human being in all my life. Starting at the bottom I work my way up to heaven.

Black shoes, perfectly pressed black trousers, charcoal coloured shirt with black and white stripes covering what I know to be the most perfect chest ever known to man, black tie- loosely fastened, black suit jacket, out is the strip of hair on his chin, in is designer stubble and gone are the spikes in favour of a slicked back look, I swear if I didn't have such self control, the man would be naked right now

"I look okay then?" He teases as I continue to stare and then raising one finger he places it under my chin and gently raises it so that my mouth closes "You're drooling Kim, it's not a good look"

"Well you shouldn't have dressed so damn hot then… or at least you could have given a girl a warning" We share a grin and then I search for his dinner companion. "Where's your orange friend tonight?"

"Probably at the hotel, arranging for me to be fired as we speak"

"No date?" I ask whilst looking around again.

He'd better not have a date! The Orange Goblin I can just about deal with, but if he's come all the way to my city and hooked up with someone that isn't me I am going to have to forget about kicking Marcus' ass and kick Tommys first… but not until I've scratched his dates eyes out first… if he has one … he'd better not have one

"Oh I have a date"

"Oh…" I silently berate myself for not being able to keep the surprise or disappointment from my voice "Wow, aren't we the fast worker these days?"

"I wouldn't exactly call it a fast work, in fact, between us…"

The way he leans into me as though he's going to tell me a secret causes me to want to put my lips on his, even if it's just to stop him telling me about some girl- that isn't me, being his date

"I think she's had a thing for me for a while now"

The wink he gives me as a full stop causes baby pterodactyls to take flight in my stomach

"So you brought her with you from Reefside?"

Okay, I'm officially confused- he didn't mention anything about this last night. As far as I knew he and The Orange One were travelling alone

"No she lives here"

Frowning, I try to work out what the hell he's trying to tell me. He's known her for a while but she lives in New York? Didn't Tommy just get through telling me last night how he'd never been to New York?

It's all too much for my still recovering brain

"So Tommy, do I uh… get to meet her?"

Do I get to kill her is what I really want to ask but Tommy and I are just friends these days, he can go on a date with anyone he likes and I no longer have the right to cause them physical damage

"Tommy? Sorry Kim, but I don't know any 'Tommy' you must have me mistaken with one of your other guys"

Okay, the guy might look hot enough to eat but he is seriously messing with my head and I am not coping with it at all

"Did somebody kick you in the head when you were sparring or something, did it damage something important… like your brain?"

"Kimberly Hart, say hello to… Tom"

"You're my date?"

Oh My God, Eva, I love you, I love you, I love you !

"Surprised?"

"But how…?"

"Eva told me there was a certain damsel in need of rescuing, you know how I could never say no"

The mischievous lilt in his voice is new, but it's making my heart race so I play along

"Which means I'm your date?"

"Surprise!"

"Well I hate to dent your ego _**Tom**_ but I do not have a _**thing**_ for you, okay? In fact- if you remember it was me who dumped you "

"You've regretted it every day since"

"Says who?!"

"I can just tell" he says whilst shrugging like he knows his statement is the truth

"Oh, like I can just tell that you never got over it"

"I got over it, Kimberly, it's the getting over _**you**_ that I'm still struggling with"

He never looks away, not even after he's made the statement that's now causing my mouth to hang open again. His eyes are burning into me, daring me to speak.

I don't know who this guy is, but it's definitely not the 'Dr. Tommy Oliver' that I've been getting to know recently, this one's different… dangerous

Again raising his finger to my chin, he softly pushes my mouth closed before lowering his head to mine

"How about you introduce me to Mr. I'm-about-to-get-my-ass-whipped and you can gawp at me later okay?"

Walking past me, I hear him talking to the waiter before his hand wraps its self around my wrist and he gently pulls me into the dining room


	19. We Were Supposed To Live Our Lives

**DISCLAIMER: I Own Nothing**

_***Sorry it's been so long since I last updated but I kind of got caught up in When Darkness Falls and then I moved and couldn't get my internet reconnected without jumping through a million hoops. I just hope there is still an interest in this story because I always enjoy writing it**_

**CHAPTER 19**- **We Were Supposed To Spend Our Lives Together… We Didn't!**

Pushing the salad I've barely touched around my plate I hear a sound rise and fall from the direction of Marcus and although the words don't register as language, the way 'my date' sits up tall in his seat and releases a long, deep, deliberate breath I know I should be offended… but I'm not.

In fact, I'm too high on 'eau de heaven' to register anything other than the way Tommys body heat is radiating through his suit and then burning through mine so that every fibre of my body is rocking out to 'Go Green/White Ranger, Go'

God, he makes me feel as though I'm 15 again!

How I wish I was 15 again!

I wish he would look at me the way he used to, smile at me the way that melted my heart, I wish he would take me in his arms and hold me with the intensity he did when we were 15... and then 27 year old Kim kicks in and I realise that everything 17 year old Tommy gave me wouldn't be nearly enough these days, not after I've witnessed the danger in 27 year old Tommys eyes.

17 year old Tommy might have owned my heart but 27 year old Tommy owns that and the rights to every naughty thought I've ever had

Sitting just inches from him now has caused butterflies the size of Pterodactyls to wage a war on my stomach. My heart beat trebles every time anything of his touches anything of mine… and trust me, there has been a lot of touching!

In fact, every time Marcus speaks Tommys hand brushes mine and I'm not sure whether he's trying to soothe me or stop me from ripping Marcus' rusty heart out of his chest but in truth all he's really doing is succeed in convincing me that this is not over… _we_ are not over.

How can one smile from a man that I split up with over 10 years ago set a fire in me that burns through every emotional barricade I've ever put up?

I mean, come on, 10 years is a long time. It's a lot of dates and a lot of other guys.

True, most of them had a black cross next to their name long before the butter had even melted on the popcorn but one or two of them got close, but not one of them got near my heart, not like this, not like _him_.

I deal with the professional conversation that keeps interrupting the thoughts of my happy ending with Tommy as though I'd heard every word that they've said, but trust me… I haven't! but I know my job, and I know my clients, God knows I worked hard enough to win us this account, and the way that Tommy smiles proudly down at me every time I say something that impresses them just feeds the eternal longing I have for his attention

As I push my plate away from me and then take a sip of my water, I settle back to enjoy the silence whilst everyone else continues to eat, and Marcus continues to empty that wine bottle. The 'You always were a cheap date, huh Tom?' that slurs its way through three glasses of wine and then falls embarrassingly from his lips tells me that I will never enjoy anything whilst he is around, but the fire that had driven every step it took to get me here, the one I had been planning on using to burn Marcus alive, died out the second I saw Tommy standing there, looking like a God, looking that way for me, even after everything I put him through.

The flames I had been planning on using to hurt Marcus have now turned on me and are doing their best to burn away what remains of my senses… and my self control

"Are you okay?"

The feel of Tommys breath on my cheek tells me that his lips are mere inches from my face and for a split second I almost forget where I am and why I'm here. The sudden urge to just turn my head and press my lips to his is almost too much to resist.

I wonder if he will still taste the same… or react with the same shyness he always did when we were in high school. Judging by the show in sexy confidence he put on earlier I doubt it but now I'm intriguing myself with thoughts of his reaction.

Would he pull away, or pull me close?

Would he be impressed by my bravery of appalled by it?

Would it even be bravery or would it be stupidity?

And why do questions only bring more questions, and never answers?

"Kim?"

His breath kisses my cheek once more only this time it acts like water being thrown onto a fire

I have to get out of here… and I have to take Tommy with me

I have to not lose us this account but I need air.

I need to talk to Tommy about us, and what's going on between us because I still feel it… eating me alive!

I feel him… like I never left, like I never lost him and it's too much.

I can't deal with this, not knowing if he feels the same.

I can't think straight until I know…

So I'm ending it… one way or another I need to know how he feels and I need to know now

**TOMMYS P.O.V**

Okay… I'm a trained ninja, I know ways to kill a guy before his body even realises that it's been hurt… the guy in front of me has two seconds to say something… anything, to convince me that his life is worth saving.

You see there's rules for this sort of situation.

1. Never drink more than you can handle … especially when you're in the company of a ninja that hates bad table manners

2. Never insult the girl a ninja loves whilst he's sitting right in front of you

…Wait, hold up a second…did I say 'loves'? What I meant to say was 'loved' as in past tense, as in used to, as in doesn't anymore…

Pushing my steak from one side of my plate to the other I feel my appetite shrinking as a feeling inside me begins to grow.

It's something I recognise from a life time ago, a fire… an uncontrollable burning in my chest, it's a feeling that drove me to the edge of my sanity once upon a time, a feeling that I'd hoped had been extinguished 10 years ago, but in truth I know it's a feeling that's always been smouldering below the surface. Just waiting for the one person that has always been like fuel to my fire…

I really shouldn't be thinking like this- like some hopeless romantic, the type that spends their entire life dreaming of one perfect moment whilst all the real moments in life pass them by. I should be the cool, calm… irresistible Tommy that I pretended to be less than an hour ago and I had planned to be him all night but one look at the expression on Kims face as I rescued her… again, and I was a stuttering wreck… again.

So far I think I've masked it well, instead of speaking I just smile and nod and every time the idiot drowning in wine steps out of line I remind him that I am 4 inches taller than him and quite willing to kick his ass, even here, even in this nice suit that cost me a fortune.

So far it's kept him in line, but that wise crack he just made about Kim being a cheap date has just earned him a private audience with my fist.

Now, I'm not an aggressive guy, that might sound silly coming from a guy that's a black belt in karate 6 times over and has spent years of his life dressing in spandex just so he got to fight every evil that walked the face of the earth, but it's the truth.

I never fight for the sake of fighting, in fact outside of the gym, I never fight… (alien evil excluded) but this guy is effecting me like no one else. Every time he breathes I want to lean across and rip his wind pipe out and every time he so much as glances in Kims direction I feel the urge to jump the table and rip his head from his shoulders.

It's extreme… I admit it, but I haven't felt this alive in years.

Aggression is bubbling through my veins yet every time I look at Kim it becomes something else, something more gentle yet no less powerful, it's as though I've come to life tonight after hibernating for 10 years, my body is acting instinctively but my brain is struggling to catch up. To comprehend what this all means.

Taking a sip of my water I find my eyes unable to look anywhere other than into Kims, I feel my heart liquefying as she smiles up at me shyly and then chews on her bottom lip as the bald French man talks a language that I don't understand… and no it's not French, it's fashion!

I've never had much understanding of it, as far as I'm concerned, clothes are clothes, you wear them so you don't get arrested for not wearing them… but that's not how Kim sees it. To her, clothes are something more… she sees fashion as an expression of her soul, and as I listen to her, I begin to fall in love with this strange new language… the way she speaks it is drawing me in and making me wish I was fluent, just so I could be part of the conversation, just so her attention was on me and only me

She's sitting closer to me than she has in 10 years and yet in this instant I miss her more than I ever thought possible, I watch her lips move but I'm suddenly deaf to any sound other than my heart screaming out for all the times I lived without her, for all the years that I walked through life, blind to everything but the cloud of sorrow that hung over my head.

A cold loneliness drips through my veins as I think about all the things we were supposed to experience together and never did.

We were supposed to travel Europe together, we were supposed to spend our days exploring strange cities, spend our evenings discovering new foods and sipping wine as the sun set, we were supposed to fall asleep in each others arms and wake, bathed in sunlight like we were the only people alive in the whole world, we were supposed to live our lives together… we haven't.

In truth I don't know anything about the woman sat next to me anymore.

I don't know what she eats when she goes to restaurants, I don't know what she dreams about when she closes her eyes… I don't know if she sleeps on the left side of the bed or the right or whether she hogs the covers…

My eyes fall to the half eaten plate of food before me and for a second I feel like I could cry for everything we lost when she left me… but I don't

Instead my eyes shoot up and lock onto the bloodshot ones opposite to me.

Temper sparks through every inch of me…

He did not just say what I thought he did

My eyes desperately seek out Kim but all I see is her back as she flees the table

The bald French man and his companions look shocked as they signal for the bill and mutter something in their native tongue

For an instant I'm torn… kill the man in front of me or… before I can give it another thought I'm out of my seat and exciting the dining room with only one thought on my mind… Kimberly… I still love Kimberly

**OUTSIDE THE RESTAURANT**

"Kimberly hold up!"

I'm running after her as quickly as I can, but the fitted nature of my pants is making the job a little bit difficult.

"Kim!"

It's dark out and as I exit the parking lot I realise I have no idea in which direction she's gone… I could continue to yell like an idiot but in the noise of New York City I doubt she'd hear it

"Bet you'd kill for some spandex about now- huh?"

But I hear that!

Spinning around I seek out the source of the voice and it doesn't take me long to find Kim sat on a low wall with her hands shoved deep into her jacket pockets and her beautiful eyes shining with tears.

If I thought for a second it would be possible for me to walk away from her right now I'd be inside that restaurant teaching Marcus the way of the fist, but it's useless… she's got me useless again

"Are you okay?"

I join her on the wall as she nods her head to let me know that she is, the wet sniff she lets out tells me that she isn't

"Kim, the guy's a jackass, forget him"

"Tommy, the guy's my boss, I have to see him every day"

"So get a new boss, I'd hire you"

I say it with such enthusiasm that it causes her to laugh and the sound is so beautiful that I can't help but to reach out and take a hold of her hand, to my enormous relief she doesn't pull it away

"I mean it Kim, you could go somewhere else, you are so talented… you blew those guys away in there. You don't have to work for someone that treats you the way he does"

She nods but never says a word, her eyes are gazing at the ground like she has the weight of the world on her shoulders. Something tells me that this isn't just about Marcus

"Tommy, I need to talk to you about something and I don't know how you're going to take it but…"

"Kim…"

I brush my finger over the back of her hand and hope she knows that I want to talk about it too… I'm ready to face this, whatever 'this' is.

"Kim, not here"

I know that I shouldn't be doing this, I mean this really isn't what I do… I have been on the other side of this kind of deceit, I've seen the destruction it causes. I'd always viewed this situation in black and white, always believed that if you were with one person you didn't fall in love with someone else… but what if you never fell out of love with them in the first place? What if unbeknownst to you, you've spent your entire life waiting for them…

This is ridiculous! I have a responsibility to Katherine…

Kat! Have I really gone through all of this without giving her even one thought?

This is my girlfriend that I'm talking about and I can't even remember the last time I thought about her or called her… I've been too caught up in myself… and Kim

What type of person am I turning into?!

I pull my hand away from Kimberly and struggle against the guilt that has just hit me like a left hook.

What the hell am I doing?!

"Tommy?"

"Kim…" I don't know what to say to her, shame at my behaviour has caused every word to dry out and become stuck in my throat.

I want to tell her that my feelings have never changed

That I still love her the way I always did and that living without her has meant that I haven't been living at all

But I have responsibilities to someone else, someone who has trusted me to do the right thing by her…

Damn me and my constant need to do the right thing by everyone but myself!

"Tommy, are you okay?"

No

"Yes, Kim I'm fine"

But I'm not fine, shame and guilt are quickly turning to anger- I'm angry at Katherine for binding me to her with some tired sense of responsibility… and I'm angry at Kim- why couldn't she just have just loved me enough to stay with me in the first place, none of this would be happening if she had just stayed!

But most of all I'm just angry at myself, I'm playing with peoples lives… and although that is the last thing I ever wanted to do it's what I'm doing and when Kimberly and Katherine find out they are going to hate me for what I've done

Suddenly all I can hear are Marcus' words from 10 minutes earlier, they're ringing in my ears and redirecting all my anger and frustration. Deep down I know it isn't him that I'm really angry with but I see Kim fleeing the dining room, humiliated… by him.

I hear her tearful words over the phone… because of him!

His words play over and over until they are all I can hear, all I can think about, all I can feel angry about and before I know it I'm off the wall

"I can't let him get away with speaking to you like that, it wouldn't be right"

"Tommy it doesn't matter"

I'm backing away from her and I can see panic sparking in her eyes

"You said it yourself he's a jackass"

"He was out of line, no body speaks to you like that… no body!"

"What he thinks doesn't matter, I thought we were going to talk"

"We will"

Turning away from Kimberly I begin to run, the more I think about the situation I am in and what it's going to take to get myself out of it the faster I run, with only one destination in mind and only one confrontation in sight


End file.
